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wanttoscream's picture

Submitted by wanttoscream on Tue, 07/09/2013 - 6:10pm

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So glad I stumbled across this site yesterday. I thought it was just me and I was some horrible, awful person. I do love my SD's 19/14. But I just don't like my SS11 at all. I did at first, but his behavior and his BM's constant intrusions are driving me insane. As I mentioned in a few other posts, my DH and I were married before. We married when I was 19 and a junior in college. Way too young! I miscarried our baby while he was at basic training, and things went downhill from there. Fast forward twenty plus years, and I am divorced with two boys 20/14 and he is divorcing with three kids. We ran into each other by chance and, long story short, remarried on June of this year on what would have been our 25th Anniversary. It has made for an odd dynamic, since technically, I was there first. His ex/kids BM was LIVID that we got back together. Even though she had a boyfriend when she filed for divorce. My DH is on disability and moved into my house, that I bought after my divorce. I pay most of the bills, and it is tight at times. I am determined our marriage WILL work this time, I just have to learn to roll with this stepmom thing. :sick:

queenofthedamned's picture

Submitted by queenofthedamned on Tue, 07/09/2013 - 6:35pm

Oh wow! welcome - you definitely have a unique perspective!

SanAntonioSoccerMom's picture

Submitted by SanAntonioSoccerMom on Tue, 07/09/2013 - 6:45pm

*Side Story*

My coworker was dating a man that had two kids by two women. He broke up with her after a year of dating...out of the blue...and got back with BM1. Their kid is 15. So then for his visitation he picked up his 7 year old and took the kid to Alambama (from Texas) and stayed with BM1 for a month. I am sure BM2 was livid, as was my friend.

wanttoscream's picture

Submitted by wanttoscream on Tue, 07/09/2013 - 6:51pm

I would have been livid myself. I went off because my ex took our youngest (not quite 13 at the time) across state lines with his GF without letting me know they were leaving the state for vacation. Then told my son NOT to tell me. My son, of course, texted me the minute they crossed the state line.

oldone's picture

Submitted by oldone on Tue, 07/09/2013 - 6:55pm

It actually is not that uncommon.

I am an older woman so have been around long enough to have seen almost everything.

A co-worker was married in Catholic church to her husband, divorced after 3-4 years. He remarried (civil marriage) and had 2 kids with 2nd wife. About 15 years later they hooked back up (2nd wife was in the dark he was not divorced from her). Her rational was that he was still her husband in the church - he eventually did divorce 2nd wife and remarried first.

DH's 2nd wife was divorced by her first husband so he could marry his secretary. They fought in court for 15 years and she HATED him. But when he got divorced she left DH and went back to him.

DH divorced his first wife but remarried her a decade later.

I have at least a dozen other similar stories.

This is why I am adamant that a husband should have very, very limited contact with his ex.