The Mothers Day drama=and SD17 responded to my email
Last Friday, I was going to H's apartment, then to go see bs (about an hour from H). Things did not go well.
Today is my b.d. No big deal to me anymore, but H told me to come to the apartment and we would celebrate early. As usual, we ended up in a huge fight; H wanted to know how much I had in my checking account. I told him. Then I asked him yet again exactly how much debt he actually has. Again he refused to tell me, told me that it doesn't affect me. Yeah right. The 50% garnishment doesn't affect me. I have a stomache ache every day of my life over it, and tho I don't know the total amount, I know that it's huge. A huge argument ensued. I left and came home.
Sat. I received an email from SD17, in response to the email I sent her weeks ago. She justified every one of her actions-even her rudeness. She stated that she is an "honest" person and that will get her thru life and what she says is an "honest" opinion and that's who she is, sorry if I don't like it. I informed missy that in the future, if I needed her opinion, I would ask for it. She also defended walking in without knocking...still making an issue out of that little detail. And she ended it, telling me how she "did not appreciate getting stuck with sending out graduation announcements". I told her that I had sent my own out, bs sent his own out, it was our graduations, after all, and we didn't find it too much of a burden. I also told her that she has a mother and a father and if they chose not to help her, well, so sorry.
So on to Mother's Day. H's & SD14's little dog has now been left here in my care since Christmas. He had been at BMs until they just "dumped" him here. Now, I am an animal lover. And I loved this little guy too. But-he cannot be left alone. If left alone, he will wreck all kinds of havoc. He poops and pees in the house. He has seperation anxiety big time. You cannot leave him outside in the kennel as he will dig out. If you put him on a chain in the kennel, he will bark incessently. He is a handful.
I wanted to go see my BS for Mothers Day. But cannot take a dog to his apartment. So I called SD14 and told her I was bringing the little dog to their house. Before I could leave, BM called and left a voicemail saying, Sorry. I can't have the dog here. He's too much to deal with.
I was p.o. Called H. H said he would meet me and take the dog. Then he calls back and backpedals-told me to leave the dog in the garage. I was furious. The garage? The garage happens to belong to my parents (who, by the way are very particular). I cannot leave the dog locked in there to bark all day, and we all know that the pee would seep into the cement floor, leaving it to smell - something my folks would not appreciate. So 2 hours of argument ensued, making it too late for me to drive to my sons, before H finally agreed to take the dog. Then H told me he is taking the dog to the pound, because he doesn't know what else to do with it. I cried the whole way to meet H.
So last nite H calls and says, gee, I can't take this little dog to the pound-he's snuggled up to me right now.
The man was pulling my chain ladies. He obviously had no intent on taking the dog to the pound. I am being played. I spent Mothers Day driving a dog that isn't mine to H's because the people he belongs to dumped all responsiblites on me. I did not even get to see my own son on Mothers Day.
I'm am so sick of these people. All of them. I have had it.
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Ohhh Bewitched
I am so sorry to hear that. Can you get a crate to keep him in when you need to leave? I crate my 2 inside the house when we leave because of separation anxiety. I also turn the radio on the jazz station and it calms them. They still have the separation anxiety, but it is MUCH better. When left out we returned to messes, but not from bodily functions...everything ripped to shreds like in Marley and Me. The crate has become their "safe" place also. When there is company or too many little fingers that don't know how to handle a "goggie" the doges just go in their crate to get away from the little people. Once the little people have gone, they come back out. I do understand that it should not have been your responsiblity to begin with though.
I am so sorry that you did not get to see your BS. H is an ass, but hey you already knew that. SD -- let her "brutal honesty" fill out her graduation announcements as it is surely gonna get her thru life. Ugh. I am so hoping that something comes up so you can get away from these idiots.
Anyone can take the easy way out and blame others. BUT it takes a a person of character to take a look at one's self and actions and own responsibility for their part. ~ ME ~ }:-P
I had suggested to H that he crate the dog at the apartment
"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere
And did consider crating him here. The problem there is that he barks and barks and barks and barks-and my folks live right next door. It is loud enough that you clearly hear it at their house. It's one of the prices you pay when you live in someone elses house. Unfortunately, H thinks there should be no consideration of the fact that this is not our home.
Seriously, I'm about to the point to just file. Even tho I haven't found a job...but do have interview that haven't been responded to out. It's frightening, because I've been going on interviews since December and haven't been offered a position to this day.
But the music
is soothing. I turn the volume on low and keep it on a jazz station. This calms them down a lot sooner and then they just lie in their fluffy little bed and sleep or rest until I return. I got the music tip from some expert on Dogs (some tv program) years ago that suggested this for dogs who suffer from separation anxiety. It helps. SOme days more than others, but it helps.
Anyone can take the easy way out and blame others. BUT it takes a a person of character to take a look at one's self and actions and own responsibility for their part. ~ ME ~ }:-P
"She stated that she is an
"She stated that she is an "honest" person and that will get her thru life and what she says is an "honest" opinion and that's who she is, sorry if I don't like it."
I had a "friend" do this to me once in an email. Three to be exact. I am part of a yahoo group with about 7 other theatre friends. This one woman in particular sent me three scathing emails, tearing into me for using the group site as a "blog" by posting too much about my life (you know- that I was getting married, then that I was expecting, and that I was going to be graduating from college, not like they were any BIG things or anything.) I know I can babble on even in writing, but I swear my emails were all a paragraph one time a week, and maybe a couple of lines response when other people wrote me about something. I was very ill with my pregnancy when I logged on and read them and I sobbed to think I was annoying all my friends. I only forwarded them to one friend who is the admin of the site asking if I was doing something wrong. And he wrote back that she had no write to state she spoke for the group, that no one else was bothered by anything I did. But I stopped writing or going out with them all because I was so upset. Then I guess that wasn't good enough for her, as she complained still about the whole thing ANY time they got together because I wasn't there.
That made everyone mad at HER and they ended up trying to engage with me to get me back on there more.
The whole thing made me realize that some people claim their being "honest" when really they are being hurtful and spiteful and perhaps are so envious of you that they feel the need to shoot you down to feel better (this woman's BF didn't want to get married, and her kids were starting to move out of the house when I was writing these things and I think THAT's what annoyed her.)
Your SD will never get it, because you are the only one trying to make her see her ways and she doesn't value you and can dismiss every word. I don't know even if it came from someone she cared about that she would see it as my SD sometimes decides that I have manipulated her dad to defend me to her.
And those grad announcements- "I also told her that she has a mother and a father and if they chose not to help her, well, so sorry." I am floored! She is so rude to you then thinks you owe her a favor that she would never appreciate even if you did it? Ugh.
And I have to say I agree with P. Get a decent crate and stick him in it so you can have your day. I am glad he is with H and sincerely hope he keeps him with HIM from now on. When are you getting out of their clutches????
Oh, Sita, I have been so upset over everything, I had planned
"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere
to just call the legal aid attorney and ask her to file today. But I slept on it and am so undecided. It would be financial suicide with no job-it's NEVER taken me this long to find work..ever.
I am, to be honest, not surprised at SD17's email justifications.
Thing is, if she's so honest, how'd she end up getting caught shoplifing? That is quite the opposite of honest. I'm done trying-with any and all of them. I told H how disappointed I was, hurt, not to see my son on Mothers Day and how unhappy my son was that I couldn't get there. H did not give a damn.
I'm furious. I'm sicked. I just want to file and get it over with.
If my SD or DH
disrespected me that way I would have to give them a flying bitch-slap just like this:
http://yourdailychum.com/2008/11/16/flying-bitchslap-just-what-you-need-...
Sorry you're having to deal with all that from them!
"OCD sucks"
Habit and routine have an unbelievable power to destroy.
--Henri de Lubac
Next time, I would board the
Next time, I would board the dog for the day & send the bill to Bm or SD14. Or drop it off anyway & if she doesn't want it there, she can pay to board it for the day. Those people are insane! I'm sorry you have to deal with them. How come your son didn't come visit you at your house?
Well, happy birthday...I hope today is a better day for you!
"You never realize how short a month is until you pay child support"
How did I miss this
Your h. has his own apartment??!! I did not realize! (yay ;)!)
"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin
BW!
Hey girl all I gotta say is SD17 is going to be a witch forever and you are too good of a person to even deal with these people!!! I am waiting for that post that says you kicked them all to the curb my friend! As for the dog - crate him - he will bark for awhile and then he will get over it. I could never drop a dog off at the pound cuz I am a huge animal lover but I would be pissed to if it got dumped on me. Sorry mama!