Alone
Why is it that the one person who is suppose to listen to you and have your back doesn't? The person who is suppose to be in love with you basically tells you you're on your own when it comes to his ex. I can vent on here, vent to my friends and I get feed back, something DH gives me nothing. He turns a blind eye when BM does something towards me or him or the skids. I just want to say geez thanks. It changes the way I see him. He just doesn't understand. A few weeks ago my ex called me some names. I told DH, he was all over it. BM has been calling me names and he does nothing. Not even says a word. Tells me the drama needs to stop. He says well I can't punch her in the face. The least he could do is speak up for me instead sticking his head in the mud. I am really disgusted by this. It happens everytime. I can't even look at him the way a wife should. I shouldn't have to tell him to stand up for me or himself. But that's the way it is. He doesn't know how it makes him look in my eyes. I don't guess that matters.
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That's got to be hard to deal with.
Thank goodness my DH has always stood up for me agaist anyone who may be negative about me, SK's, Beast Bitch, even punched his own brother in the mouth for a stupid comment about me. Why would he let her sit around and talk badly about you and him not say anything to her?
I'm sorry you have to endure this. Maybe next time your X says anything negative about him don't defend him and make sure DH knows he wasn't taken up for. Also, if you know that BM is sitting there badmouthing you and he isn't doing anything about it......get on the phone with her yourself and tell her just exactaly what he should be telling her. I know, that's usually pointless. But I'm real quick to make sure people are aware to not have my name in thier mouth! I've told Beast Bitch a few times that if she has something to say about me, she needs to say it to me. Then I give her no choice because she won't speak to DH again until she either apologizes to me or we figure out what the problem is.
I can relate - I feel alone too!
My DH is the same way. He just sits there and lets BM trash me! Whenever I do stand up for myself he tells me to shut up (in front of BM)! He also never disciplines the kids whenever they're disrespectful to me. He's so weak and passive - I can't stand him right now!
Yesterday, we had an argument about my SD. She has not had much contact with us for 5 years. The last time we saw her was a year ago, Dec 17, 2007! Her excuse for not seeing us changes every day, but her excuse for the past year has been that she was mad at my DH for not telling her he wasn't her biological father. She has been seeing her biological father since her mother has been carrying on an affair with him while her current husband was in Iraq. Her mother has convinced her to be angry at the man who loved and raised her and is still paying child support for her, but her Biological father was never there for her - he just walked away. Out of nowhere, my SD decides she wants to see my DH and made my DH feel guilty by telling her brother that ever since my DH found out that she's been seeing her biofather, he doesn't want anything to do with her. She was the one who said she was mad at him, she never returned his phone calls or text messages and ignored him on father's day and his birthday. Her mother does that guilt thing all the time - she never takes responsibility for her actions. I think the affair is over for the moment, that's why there's this sudden contact with my DH. I've told my DH, that clearly something is up and most likely the only reason my SD is contacting him is because christmas is in a few weeks. He jumped all over me and tried to turn it all around on me about why we don't see my SD. I was so hurt. I have done everything I can to maintain a relationship with her, but I'm not putting any energy into it anymore. He says I'm mean and evil, but I'm the one he takes his frustration out on when he's mad or hurt about the kids. He could care less about me or my feelings. The SMom3
This is EXACTLY what I'm
This is EXACTLY what I'm afraid of SS doing to my DH if he doesn't tell him he's not his real father soon...he's going to be mad he was lied to. How old was she when she found out?
"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"
She was influenced by her mother
I think SD was 13 when she found out, but decided she was mad at my DH when she was 15. This coincided with her mother having an affair with SD biological father (again) and planning on leaving her husband for SD BioDad. SD stepdad also said for the past year she was mad at him and treating him horribly as well. Her mother wanted SD to recognize BioDad as the great guy - he's a deadbeat who didn't give her any love, guidance or financial support. SD should be mad at her mom and Biodad. SD has had a different excuse every time my DH addressed why she doesn't call him or see him. Her mother and Biodad's fling ended recently, so now it ok with her mother to see my DH again and keep the child support coming. As crappy as SD treats me, I feel sorry for her. SMom3