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SS pulling crap for Christmas...thanks BM...p.s. You suck!

Purple hope's picture

SS got in trouble awhile ago and once again decided that it's all because dh left BM. I am calling bullshit. It's been 7 years...just cause your psycho mom plays the victim card constantly, doesn't mean you have to join in. Ungrateful child has decided (suddenly, only after getting in trouble) that he doesn't really want to come here anymore. Of course, he has said that he might come from xmas day for a few hours but not sure how long. In my book, this means that he just wants to come get his gifts and then go cheese up to mom about how the divorce has made both their lives so very hard. I am so sick of him playing this game. Well, let him pull this...and I am DONE. No more support, no more anything from me, and I'll do anything in my power to get dh to cut his spoiled butt off also. If he chooses not to be a part of this family, then I'll cut him out like a tumor, I'm not going to allow my dh to be treated like a doormat by kids, just like their mom did....and I've got pull, too.

Sorry, just needed to rant...advise always welcome, you people rock! Merry Christmas to all of you that do so much for someone else's kid.

Purple

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Sounds so much like SheSloth!! She doesn't get her way here...or gets in trouble...she wants to move back in with BM. She gets in trouble at BM's during a visit, and gets in trouble, she doesn't talk to BM for a month!!

Purple hope's picture

My new mantra....not my monkeys, not my circus, not my monkeys...not my circus, lol

That one ROCKS

Somuchdrama's picture

This story is so disgustingly similar to mine. Only I am at the "cut the limb off the family tree" part. Of course my SS17 is the victim again. "Daddy chose Somuchdrama over his own kids". Couldn't be that he is just a jerk that just uses us and tries to cause drama.

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

I so relate...especially right now! Yeah, everyone in DH's family right now are such bad people! SheSloth gets in trouble, and she runs to her mom with "Everyone is coming down on me! They make me feel like I'm worthless!" So, again she gets to run away from the trouble, because BM calls DH last night cussing him out and saying that SheSloth is not coming back...they will be by to pick up her stuff next week. Could it be that she is running away because for once in her life she got consequences for her actions? You bet! I'm sure that I'm the scapegoat somewhere in all of it...but I really don't care. Life around here will be better with her gone...that is a promise!

Purple hope's picture

Thanks for response

It's just so frustrating and I think being the step parent makes me feel hurt and helpless. I'm trying so hard not to give a shit, but when he's sweet and thankful and appreciative and normal, I get sucked in again. Then he pulls the...."it's not personal, I just want to go back to BMs
" crap I'm like, ugh. I want to tell him to freaking pick either he is or is not a part of this family and this coming and going doesn't work for me. It's also hard, I know dh is hurt about it and I don't know how to help him. I'm so glad your giving yours consequences and sticking to them, as least some of us are trying to teach these ingrates something positive.

The worst thing is...BM is pulling the strings behind it all and I just sometimes wish she'd get hit by a bus!

Ugh, ugh, ugh
Purple

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

"I'm trying so hard not to give a shit, but when he's sweet and thankful and appreciative and normal, I get sucked in again."

I've been in SheSloth's life for 14 years, so I so get this. At some point, you do get tired of being treated like crap, and you find you truly DON'T give a shit any longer. That is the point I've gotten to! Was I still upset that SheSloth ran back to BM's? Sure, but not because I felt hurt. I felt used. I even told DH, "So, when she can't handle the girl and needs my help, I'm good...but when I do exactly as she expected me to, I'm a bitch and she doesn't want her daughter around me?" Yes...BM does pull some strings...but SheSloth is definitely pulling hers! "They are so mean! They took away my phone, my computer, etc." Well, maybe you shouldn't have snuck out at all hours to meet boys and gotten picked up by the cops!

So yeah...we gave consequences, and BM allowed her to run away from them! There is ZERO punishment at BM's right now for what SheSloth did! BM is pulling the same bit DH did when SheSloth first moved in with us..."it didn't happen while she was here, so I'm not going to punish her"! Not to mention, SheSloth right now has BM believing that everyone on this side hates her and makes her feel 2 inches tall, so BM is being overly supportive through all this..."my poor baby...they were ALL so mean to you"! BARF!

Rags's picture

How old is the spawn? If he is past the age range of the CO then by all means, cut him off cold.