Thx all...I also really have the need to share that I was aware of my SD 15 being boy crazy..like her older sister..who both appear to be following in the same steps as their low moral BM....their BM tought them to "work it"..so they tell me with a look of satisfaction..well..I also left because I was NOT going to be babysitting and changing diapers for those girls if they turned up pregnant and dumped the poor child on me because I was available and too caring to say no..well.....NO WAY!...I am too smart now and can see this coming...

Thank you.
I will briefly explain how I got to the point of finally leaving.I had the personality that if relationships go wrong..well I blamed myself as if something was wrong with me..and needed fixing.. So I studied self help and vented here quite awhile until I discovered I was playing out the role of a RESCUER.When my DH inherited the skids,that gave me the perfect situation..I took on DH responsibilities.. to play out my role.They needed to be rescued so I thought. It didnt work. They didnt see any problems with their lifestyle. After all they were a family reunited..I was the outsider.. and I had better accept it or LEAVE..as my DH stated. Well shortly before he said that, I realized that the last time I would play that role would be to RESCUE MYSELF! So, all that wasted energy I spent years trying to make life happy for all of us which was rejected..I turned the energy to myself. I got myself out of that unhealthy situation. I recorded some of those conversations with DH about asserting my needs. He dismissed them. Yet as I listened to myself on the recordings..I was respectful and true to myself as I gradually departed that family. I still care..Im not angry..Im wise.And I have gained so much confidence. Im grateful for this forum..you folks have helped me..and I hope this helps others too.

Hi TOG..Ill clarify..
Yes I knew about the skids and DH repeatedly assured me that we would not have them FT. I got along well with all but one SD17. The main issue in the marriage wasnt the skids. It was that when they came to live with us( their druggy prostitute BM and her new BF abused them)that DH turned his attention to his needy kids. Initially I was patient, understanding and waited to have my marriage attended to. It never happened. I was so neglected and repeatedly addressed this issue with DH..I felt that I would of stayed in that family IF my DH would of supported me emotionally as I adjusted..he belittled me in front of skids which gave them the clear message that I wasnt an equal and I could be disrespected..I remained hopeful things would change as I learned my place..which was chief cook and bottle washer with no voice as I had no authority to expect a SS12 to take out the garbage and sweep the floor. DH had poor follow thru..It drove me nuts living with them.They never offered to find a way that worked for all of us.I was willing to go to family and marriage counseling..they refused..The marriage was neglected and the same thing happens to a unwatered rose..it wilts and dies.
YES.I knew about the skids, yet I never thought my NEW husband would abandon me the way he did.He wasnt even motivated to learn how to make our marriage priority.

And I know now why we ended up together in the first place. Lessons learned.

I see yr point...however if MaMa aint happy..nobody is happy..right?..What Im striving to say is that if the marriage comes first..then the kids get double the attention to get needs met..It like on a plane crash giving me oxygen first so I can put more effort into the kids..I was not demanding..all I wanted was respect and uniterupted alone time.....my request was ignored.