SS23 attacks me, I get arrested!

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On August 21st SS23 stopped by to visit at my home. He ended up head butting me in my face when I told him that he did not get to make decisions on matters relating to what goes on in my home. I tried to retreat into the house to avoid further contact, but he blocked me and tried to pull me into my own home with the intention of beating me up on private! I am disabled. He has fought in amateur MMA bouts. My 6mo old grandson and 17 yo BD was in front room. I pulled away and went to yard. He followed me and advanced on me again. I then defended myself the only way I knew how. I hit him. He then charged me and knocked me down and brutally bashed my face numerous times. He broke my nose and gave me two black eyes before others interceded. When the cops arrived, I was the one arrested! I later found out that my wife of 1 year (dated for 8 years) had blatantly lied to the police telling them that I hit him first. I Just attened a pre trial hearing and the charges were dismissed against me. He had decided not to press charges, as had I..... The prosecutor looked at the MMA photo handout I had printed, and other info and dubiously stated "this is the victim?" :?

All I ask from my wife and SS's is the same respect in my home as they would give their grandfather if they were in his house. "In fact this is the request I made right before I was attacked!" :O

Honestly, I am considering moving out, because my wife has shown that she is willing to lie to condone her son's rude and disrespectful behavior at the cost of her husband.

This almost happened to

This almost happened to me....My sd came home and we had caught her in numerous lies so dh spoke to her about them and I went out to the car I bought that she was driving to get stuff of mine that was in it. She had me cornered in the door of the car and punched me which I pushed past her so I could get away from her hitting me any more and dh called the police. Both of us got disorderly conduct tickets which I could have fought but the police said they could have arrested both of us at the time of the incident. I asked the police how can it be okay for someone to beat on you and you have to stand by an allow it and they said that is the law. So when it came time for court I sent a letter to the city attorney requesting mine to be dismissed. I explained why I had pushed past her stating it was from being in an abusive relationship prior to this and trying to get away.

But in your case if your wife is willing to lie for her son the next time it will be worse off. I would definately leave.

agree. she showed you who the

agree.

she showed you who the most important man is in her life.

its not you.

you need to make some important decisions right now.

you have my support, but you need to think about why you are staying with this woman.

I did not delete anyone's

I did not delete anyone's post? :?

Yes, I think I agree. Her

Yes, I think I agree. Her true colors are shining through.....or, I am just finally opening my eyes to who she really is.

I am shocked that Echo was

I am shocked that Echo was outFoxied!

Bacon Under Potatoes... I

Bacon Under Potatoes...

I think I just pee'd a little.

BUP

WHY have you not filed for

WHY have you not filed for divorce and changed the locks?!? Your wife LIED to the police so her darling son wouldn't be arrested when he attacked you and watched them haul her disabled husband, the actual victim, off to jail?!? Sorry, she's an asshole.

You are "considering moving

You are "considering moving out"?!!! :jawdrop: :jawdrop:

My partner would be literally eating the dust from me hauling arse out of the house after that stunt.

Your wife has shown you were her loyalties and priorities are, and I warn you if you remain with her then her son will only get worse given his mother has enabled his violence, disrespect of you and then has stabbed you in the back when you needed her to protect you. He now KNOWS he can do what he wants, say what he wants and he can get away with it.

If she is so keen on her son, then let her have him. If you remain, then good luck but I think you are a fool! JIMPO.

I won't divorce her. If she

I won't divorce her. If she wishes to divorce me, then so be it, but I won't do that. I will however move out and get my own place where I can have the respect I deserve.

I answered your questions

I answered your questions further down, forgot to hit the reply sorry.

The sad thing, is that the SS

The sad thing, is that the SS that attacked me attacked his BM a year prior and he was arrested for it (I wasn't there, had left for several weeks because of him attacking me the same way then as now.). Now that the tables have turned and he attacks me, she covers for him. I just don't get it. I know I need to leave. It isn't easy, because even though I have been wronged, I do still have feelings for my wife. But I need to face the fact that this has created a rift between us that I alone can't heal. She has so far shown no inclination to even attempt to admit that she was wrong. Maybe my leaving will wake her up to this fact. In any case, I need to protect myself and feel safe, so I think I am going to get a place of my own as hard as it is for me to conceive.

I totally understand my wife

I totally understand my wife sticking up for her son and enabling his behavior....that's the thing, I do get it....I just do not agree with it. She is going to side with him, that's a given, but I absolutely do not agree with it. Just to clarify things, BS's, all three of them have never had their fathers in their life. The oldest basically ran the show while he was growing up. His mom let him handle decision making with her, discipline his brothers and played the role of male head of household as a minor. I get also that this is not something he is going to be willing to give up. He was the man in her life...... It really did create a symbiosis and bond between his mom and himself that in a tradition sense would be unnatural. So, now, his mom needs to decided which man she wants running the show as her equal here......and since I am not blood, I lose. I Totally understand that I put myself into this situation. I believed her when she said that once the kids hit 18 they were out of the house and on her own and we could concentrate on us....but....statistics prove otherwise I am learning..... These kids learned this behavior and their mom condoned it.....now I understand that it will never be any different and I was a fool believing otherwise. The rest was just wishful thinking on both our behalf.:(

We are here on a section 8

We are here on a section 8 housing lease in her name. I pay half the bills, in fact the rent went up from $19.00 a month to 300+ and I agreed to pay that difference myself to be here. My daughter and Gson doe live with us here on the lease as well. My BD said that even if I go she may stay. She and my wife get along fine, but I told her I don't think that is a good idea to stay here if I am not here.

OH NO!!!! THAT WAS JUST

OH NO!!!! THAT WAS JUST WRONG!! I know it may be easier said than done but that is a BIG deal breaker.........

Thank you for all the

Thank you for all the replies.

Yes, I am still here. I had hoped that I could salvage this relationship, but the wife insists that I am in the wrong for expecting to be treated with respect. She just said the she hopes I leave. The sad thing, is that she has my daughter believing that she has her best interest in mind as well, when really she doesn't.

She just told me that her kids will never respect me. I believe it. They don't even respect her!

I don't believe that once the

I don't believe that once the emotions have hit this level of physical violence, there is ever any going back and making it work. What your SS did to you is horrible. Him being trained in MMA makes it even worse. You being disabled make it monstrous on SS's part. There is no excusing this.

Your wife has made it clear that she backs her son and will continue to do so. With that means there will be no working it out as the SS will continue to be in and out of your home and his defiance growing. You don't deserve to live like that. No one does.

I think you need to get yourself another housing unit in a totally different neighborhood. Your daughter and grandson should be able to be on a lease with you and the three of you make a new start. I realize that at 17 and with child, she is basically an adult and can make her own decisions. But I think you need to try and talk to her that her remaining in this home with her stepmother would not be in her or child's best interest. If stepmom's home continues as is or becomes worse as there will be no one trying to behave as a responsible adult parenting children and setting boundaries with adult children that your daughter could perhaps actually someday face having child protective services involved and lose her baby.

Given time and being away from the current environment your daughter is living the two of you may be able to rebuild your relationship and go on to both live happier healthier lifestyles.

Honestly, I don't feel safe

Honestly, I don't feel safe here anymore when my SS stops by, I don't even want to be here for fear that I might end up in jail again, and not because I am guilty of anything. If she is willing to lie for him, then all he need do is push show up and start some more B. S. and have the cops called and have me arrested even if I don't twitch a muscle.

The youngest one already busted my tail light out on my truck earlier this year because he was angry with me. I called the cops, but did not have him arrested or charged. I tried to be the bigger individual. The middle SS is the best and most courteous. We seem to have a mutual respect for one another that the other two refuse to exhibit.