Wow! My future ss10 does the exact whiney baby thing when told no and I HATE IT SO MUCH. I feel for you tremendously. He even does it in public and its SO PATHETIC AND EMBARRASSING. I think maybe it used to work or something....now come to think of it all three siblings do it but he is youngest and does it loudest. What a disservice his parents did him with the coddling and spoiling. Anyways....onecomment: SS 6 SHOULD SOOOOO NOT BE SLEEPING IN YOUR BED. HELLO? As far as what you should do; uh....you have some major issues darling. You have every right to be uncomfortable having a 6 year old in your bed. That's crazy.

I am a proponent of co-sleeping, and I agree the skid needs outta your bed.

More importantly, there is a real issue here. I think most of us can relate to how you're feeling, but I have never known a 6 yr old to notice the disdain to this degree. Something needs to change. I think you need to be honest with dh and just say, look, we both need to be in/out of the house to avoid each other as much as possible because I just can't fake it enough. He should do it for his son, not for you. This is only going to grow into a bigger problem if left alone. I feel sorry for you, but I also feel sorry for the boy. Dad should be realistic and do what needs to be done. He can't just look away or hope something is going to change. I see counseling in somebody's future...

I don't read about the kid doing anything abnormal. I.e. nothing that would not happen in a intact family consisting of the four of you. Your feelings are understandable and on the edge or normalicy. By that I mean its normal for you to lean towards your own flesh and blood, you've invested a lot in having a kid - all mothers do, and very little in your husbands first born.

Frankly it was a mistake to bring a child into this situation but now that it exists you're going to have to act like an adult or your child will become a second child victim of their parents mistakes.

Get professional counseling. If possile from someone who specializes in broken families or step-parenting. You need to come to a logical understanding that the boy is not a threat to your child. If you cannot comes to terms with this you will have created a situation which will result in the breaking up of your marriage and there are no unwounded children in a divorce.

So if you wish your childs father and mother to remain married and live in a amicable family environment you're going to have to set aside these feelings and do a better job of faking it. I simply cannot believe that you cannot sit down and applaud a 6 year olds triumphs in reading skills. Have you done any research as to how older children react when a new baby is introduced? I thought not. It's time to do so. Either make this work or you too will be a single parent much like the mother of the boy you are fruitlessly trying to keep from becoming a member of your family.

If you don't do something quickly your husband is going to learn to hate you, your child and the situation you're creating and this will not bode well for you or your child.

I agree with what OCC^ said. I had some of this with my own 3 kids. When my youngest was born my 2 yr old toddler son started acting like a baby and wanted allllll my attention. It was easier b/c he was also my own flesh and blood but one thing I NEVER allowed was more then just the baby in our bed at night. I drew the line for everyone's health. You all need a good night's sleep and own beds. I always brought the new born into bed to nurse and at times fell asleep while doing so but mostly had a cradle right beside my own bed. The older children stayed in their own beds at night. You have to talk openly to you dh about how you feel. You can be nice without faking it or feeling guilty about it. I act nice to my ss15 all the time and he knows it and I know it but we are civil (most of the time). Your ss6 will slowly get used to this baby. Maybe involve him in going and getting the diaper for changing, helping with bathing baby by reaching for the soap, or other things. My older kids loved to "help" all the time. If you only have this kid 4 days a month, take those days to really include him in the baby care and see what happens. When you are nursing baby and the phone rings have him answer for you, or having him run and get the burping cloth. Try to include him and see how he will be "your lil man"!! He will suddenly light up and act like big brother and start being protective etc.