If anyone ever told me that being a stepparent was this difficult , I would have never made the choice to be with my husband. I previously met my husband at my old job and then started a new job where he worked, Long story short we fell in love got married and now have an 11 month old daughter , fast forward to now 3 years later. Everything sound fine and dandy right? WRONG! Throw my SS now 7 almost 8 into this and you have a HUGE mess. In the beginning BM did not know that I was around so there was no issue. But of course she is still stuck on my husband so she has to be nosey and pester my poor SS to death and hence she found out about me. My husband told me one of the first comments she made about me was " I heard she was black" . How ignorant is this?! What does anyones skin color have to do with anything give me a break! its almost 2013 for crying out loud! Did i mention she hates Mexican and both her children are are half Mexican by two different men?! To say that she is a ghetto hoodrat would be a complete understatement. So my husband works with this broad for years.. he knows that she is a psycho bitch because everyone has told him and did not take care of her current child ( pretty much an egg donor LMAO) he has seen it with his own eyes but knocks her up and almost marries her?

I just dont get it! We have gone through it a million times and I know he is sick of hearing it as Im sick of asking. He gives me the song and dance that he was in a bad place in his life( did a bunch of drugs and was an alcoholic) and things just happened. GOD give me a break! She is ugly , fat and a fucking idiot idiot ( cant even figure out how to do a second graders hoemwork) She forced you to move in with her and you couldnt use condoms?! seriously i know that Im considerably younger than him (10 years ) but what I am not is dumb! He tried to make it work , thinking that if he married her things would get better for the sake of his kid but they never did! And thank God he never went through with actually marrying her or the mess that were in now would be even bigger! Ok So there is the background to how he got in this whole mess in the first place.

Fast forward a few years we are dating and have an amazing time together. Pretty much spend every single day together from the beginning of our relationship. I had to see SS once in a while. Mind you he was/ is very quiet and never talks to anyone but would talk to me and about me. This is where the problem started! He went home to his egg donor one day apparently started about me and the shit hit the fan. She doesnt think my ex is with someone nice and she is nice to my child she should be grateful right? F*%# NO! Lets hate her and make her life a living hell! From the beginning I was playing "mommy" < I would get yelled at for helping him with his homework going anywhere with him, told my husband he was leaving HER son with a stranger , mind you we had already been together a few months and I was around all the time. I forgot to mention she would drop my SS and her other child( who is not my husbands ) off to my husband and or his family more than half the week sometimes. My husband and his family and then later myself took care of that child for years! You would think one thank you or something ! AGAIN F%@* NO! NO Rather she goes around my stepsons school and thier old mutual friends telling them that my husband is a deadbeat dad.

I tried to look past all of this and build a relationship with my SS because I knew that my husband and I were going to make a life together. I would try to be nice to her time and time again but i knew the only time she wanted to play nice was so she could drop her kids off so she could run around and be a slut with her latest bf. I got pregnant and my husband and I moved ino together, now she started telling him that she couldnt see his son. I knew it was because of me. Mind you we are dealing with my father in law having terminal cancer during all this mess. Again i played nice because I did not want to be the reason m husband couldnt have a relationship with his son. If it were anyone else I would have told them to eff off long ago but i endure the abuse because I love my husband.

Fast forward my daughter was born 2 days before new years. She calls my husband and ask if she was cute? I mean seriously and if someone can watch her son. I said absolutely not . She asked if my inlaws could ,ummm ok my father in law just had got out of the hospital that same day . and what does my idiot husband say?!?! His mom can watch her ..He is the enabler of this bitch! She runs his ass! Shouldnt that be my job since im the wife?!? She kept denying him the right to see his son , I begged and pleaded with him to go to court. I guess he finally got tired of me going off and decided to go. I told him before he went to make sure everything thing was covered in detail from vacations, who is able to care and pick him up. Do you think he did this? Of course not... My husband works ok and provides for our daughter and myself but I feel like the mom always badgering him to get important things taken care of.( Im sorry i forgot Fantasy Football is important not whether or not your wife is happy.

whew this is long .. I almost done,,, sorry i didnt realize how much I had to get out until i started typing. Currently BM has now said that I cant pick up my SS because I have caused her problems! EXCUSE ME BITCH....you are the one that is making racial comments about my daughter...because you didnt get one and thank the lord because she would end up like a stupid hoodrat like you! Tells my SS that we spend all of our money on the baby! He is not the brightest apple on the tree and is a parrot of his mom , but hey ungrateful. Your dad buys you everything you ask for even when you misbehave. Tells my SS's teacher and whoever else that I am causing problems and trying to take over. We are a family and my role as mom is to do the hw make sure kids are taken to extracurricular activities, make the doctors appts etc .

My husband and I got into it over and over and Im sick and tired of his lazy ass doing nothing. All the antics of BM are starting to affect the time we have to do things with my daughter. Im at my wits end with this mess. Ive tried to explain to him that if he doesnt geth this taken care of the right way, im leaving him for good. I tell him go back to court so the court order can be modified so we wont have issues like this anymore. Who writes the declaration ummm i do ...( while he is watching a movie on the computer). I set up the appt for him to go the workshop at the court to help him fill out the court paperwork because we do not have money for the lawyer. I told him that he needs to have every little thing in detail so crazy as BM cant pull her shit anymore. What do you think he has done? absolutely nothing! I have a course. I researched lawyers and have researched parenting plans to get this taken care of.

I found a parenting plan 19 pages long and spent Hours and hours going over it to modify it for our situation. Again , He did not offer to do one thing. Our court date is on the 28th of this month. He has a phone consultation with the lawyer at 11 am today and has to drive a considerable distance to get the court papers form the court. Do you think he is on his way and almost there. No he is still sleeping on the couch!

Im over this shit. My daughter and I will not suffer for the next ten years because I have a lazy ass for a husband! I mean this is not my child and I do everything. The reason my husband is involved in my SS's school things is because of me ! Otherwise he wouldnt give two shits! If you dont care why should I?! and Bio mom doesnt care either, she is just insecure because my husband ONLY married me, does not care about her child, she just doesnt want anyone showing her up, which I can do with my eyes closed!

Bottom line Im ready to be done and leave...I refuse to pick up the slack any longer!
ADVICE would be appreciated!