:jawdrop:
OH
MA
GAWSH

That, to me, is the unforgivable word.. so very harsh and calling your spouse names like that... yowza!!! Where did the rest of the so-called conversation go from there?

HA! BM's cocaine-addicted friend and her bullied me, calling me that name and every other name on the planet. BM's H was involved as well. Now that's fun.

His comment was WAY out of line. WAAAY.

Of course, I'd be pissed if my DH tried to tell me that my kids weren't "allowed" in my home. I think you guys both contributed to this mess.

That is a line that will never be crossed in my house. To me, it is the height of disrespectful conduct. I am not sure how I would feel continuing to live with someone like that. Wow

I reserve that word for when my wife swears at me because I think all such words are off limits. Call me a as...le then you'll get c..t right back. It works - she doesn't call me those names so I don't either.

Quit buying food. Eat on the way to and from work. Let him do the shopping, paying, preparation and clean-up as I'm sure "the boys" won't.

I also see a deep disrespect for you in the use of the word and want you to consider if the marriage is in real trouble in need of counseling.

It is obvious from this post that he does not respect you, and that is not okay. He needs to respect you, or you need to find someone who will. If you work, the house is as much yours as anybody else's and that is not okay. Yes, his sons should be allowed to visit any time they would like, but only if they can be respectful and be quiet so you can rest when you would like to. No, his friends should not have been allowed over. And also, sounds like someone needs to hand him some clippers to clip the umbilical cord. 19 and 21????? I was cooking for my parents by then and inviting them to my house. Time to make the overgrown skids grow up.

I am against name calling in general. I don't fight that way with people I love. If I call someone a swear word you can bet is because I don't like them and don't care about our relationship. In 7 years my dh and I have never once called each other names in a fight. It is immature and disrespectful and I won't tolerate it from anyone. My SILs referred to me as a derogatory name once 2 1/2 years ago. They got one warning. If it ever happens again, we're through. They think because the do it to each other it is fine. It isn't fine with me.

So I guess the question you should ask yourself is "Am I ok with being treated this way? Is it ok with me that someone can be mean and hateful just to get me to acquiece to what they want? Do I want this to be how my marriage works? Do I want to be married for someone who a) doesn't have any consideration for me without me asking for it and b) calls me names and tries to make me out to be the bad guy when I do ask for it"

OMG I'm at a loss. How disrespectful of him. Has he ever done this before? It seems so out of the blue and so inappropriate! Even in the heat of the moment, for him to call you that for "being anti-social"???? Left field!

If that were me, I'd have walked the Hell out and not come back! I've been in an abusive relationship and now I know, that's a big red flag warning sign. If your husband can disrespect you that way, that's unacceptable.

~Mel

I think both smdh and Orange County have summed it up: Is this behaviour something you can handle? If not, what do you want to do about it? Is counselling an option? If not, do you see a future with this man?

I agree completely that consideration be given for you in this regard. It does seem you may be very different people in that he is fine with being surrounded by people and you need some private time. Both types can work together but NOT if the relationship becomes offensive or disrespectful.

wow.

I would change the damn locks. DONE

If SO ever called me that lovely word. He would have one.

His outie would become an innie from the heel of my stilletto ensuring that the testosterone addled 'head' that was doing his thinking for him, was relocated to above his shoulders.

Trust that there is not a urologist in this world that would be able to reverse that procedure once I was done.

Game over.

WOW...name calling is just not right. I think you were well within your rights to ask for a night free from everyone. Even skids.

um you need to leave him. There is NEVER a time for name calling. WOW!!!!!!! :jawdrop: I think my anger would have slapped the C@NT right out of his mouth and up his ASS!

Difference in opinion is acceptable & expected in a marriage.
Namecalling is not.

Regardless of the dispute, someone who respects you will not call you names.

that is a no go word in my house I understand cursing and name calling and only a couple are banned that being one of them. That word is a relationship ender for me personally whore as well.
Regardless how your household works using the C word over a request for a quiet house screams to me there are bigger deeper issues.

NO MA'AM! UNACCEPTABLE! My husband and I have an understanding when it comes to disagreements. He understands that if he ever calls me out my name, there will be serious consequences. Your husband just showed very little respect for you. I can only pray it gets better for you.

DF and I can have had some nasty, drag down fights, but he knows two words(bitch and cunt) better never cross his lips.

If they do, we're done. Those words are reserved for people you hate.

Linda, from all your blogs, it is evident that your DH puts his boys ahead of you. He's told you the house is more theirs than yours. He's overridden your concern about underage drinking. From what you say, I can picture this man as an arrogant blowhard egotistical jerk that doesn't know how to have a good relationship with a woman. You are just an accessory. It's downright abusive. You do deserve better.

Pretty soon he'll go, ah, I didn't mean it, you just.....fill in the blank.

omg that is shameful on his behalf my husband would never even raise his voice to me we have been married two years were friends for 7 before that an i know his exs as well he never called them names or raised his voice to them sure they could argue but never going over the top ur husband needs to remember ur his wife an he needs to think about ur needs first now not his adult sons i mean its good for him to see them but every night no thanks an to be cursed at i would of calmly packed his stuff an escorted him out of the home an said when me husband who loves an respects me comes back into ur head an u have a fantastic apology let me know until then u are not welcome in my home stranger