I do feel like it's going no where. I feel like I am just being strung along but if I say anythng to him about how I feel he just turns the tables and makes me feel guilty. He'll tell me things like, "I am trying to keep a roof over our heads that's why I can't afford a ring." I feel let down and stupid.

Why would he look up his ex's wedding anouncement? I just don't understand. Why was it important? Why did he have to see it?

I'm just so sick of all of it. He thinks that after all the crap that he put me through throughout our entire relationship that because he eventually did something about it, it just makes everything go away. Like it never happened. I am still really angry about most of it. Especially about letting his ex sh!t on me for almost a year and doing nothing about it. He doesn't realize the damage that he did to our relationship and just expects me to get over it. I just can't let it go.

I think he is still hung up on his ex as well. He tells me he's not. He tells me he hates her and how abusive she was towards him throughout their marriage. If that's true why would you have pictures of your abuser hanging up in your house over six months after the divorse? (He told me that if he took them down it would make the entry way look bad.) Why would you be looking up her wedding announcement? It just doesn't make any sence. He says one thing and then does another. Actions speek louder then words.

I agree with you but you don't understand his point of view. Everything has to be financially perfect for this. Every debt needs to be paid in full. The interest percentage through the jewelers is to high. Whatever SO. I just talked with one of my friends and about this and she made a very valid point. She told me that finances will always be an issue before and after marriage. So what's the point of waiting. Something will always come up. And she was shocked that he looked up her wedding announcement. She doesn't think he is over his ex and I agree.

At this point I don't even want a ring from him. It's kind of like what cowgirl has said. You get to point where enough is enough. I'm tiered of the BS about how he's over his ex just have him turn around and look for her wedding announcement. I'm sure he'll just have another valid excuse as to why he did it. I'm tiered of the everything needs to be perfect before I can propose to you. It's all just excuses. One after the next. Nothings perfect. Nothing throughout this entire relationship has been perfect for me ever. But he gets to wait until things are perfect for him, which will be never. I don't think that's very fair. And that's one of the excuses he uses too, "I know nothings been perfect throughout the relationship that's why I want this to be perfect," meaning the ring. The only prefection he's talking about is how financially it will be perfect for him. You know things with my ex weren't perfect. He was a alcohol and drug addict. I did everything from cooking, cleaning, yardwork, paid all the bills. I mean I did it all but it sure was a lot easier to have a relationship with him then it is with SO. Don't get me wrong I would never go back to my ex ever. But even with all that, it was easier.

I agree. And I think the final straw of disresepect is looking for his ex's wedding engagement. There is no reason why he needed to do it. At least a valid one for me. I don't care if he was being nosey. It's just yet again another form of disrespect. It wasn't benefiting us in any shape or form. I don't care how insignificant he thinks it is. It's just another blow to me.

It is an insignificant small act. But when you add everything up it becomes a large significant act. SO wonders why I can't let go? He should quit doing his stupid crap. He never listens to me ever. I thinks it's always the small things that finally push us over the edge. Something that would be forgivable had the past not happened. I'm just sick of it. So sick of it. All the betrayals and I'm the one who is just supposed to move on because after all of my b!tching he finally desided to do something about it. It wasn't a conclusion that he came to on his own. Infact he was perfectly fine with how everything was. I keep telling him this relationship has been easier for him. He had no choice but to deal with his ex and his kids his baggage. It's like we're on two different sides of a river. He's got the sandy beaches on his side and mines covered in rocks and has sink holes and there's no way to get across it.