I wanted to both introduce myself to the forum and to also ask for some help at the same time. Let's start with the intro...

I am a recent step-father to the 5 kids of my FW (FutureWife) :jawdrop:

Yep, 5 stepkids. I have none of my own, so this has been quite an adjustment for me.

The 5 kids have 3 dads. The oldest is a boy 15 (almost 16 now), then a boy 11 (almost 12), a 6 year old girl and twin 4 year old boys.

My FW still says, almost every night..."You're crazy". Perhaps I am. But I love her and want to be with her, and the kids have taken a liking to me (the younger ones anyway). The oldest is living with his grandmother on his fathers side. He was not doing well in school as he ended up involved in drugs. We thought living with his father would help him out, but his father was jailed, so he ended up living with his grandmother. Go figure.

The second oldest boy is off to his dads for a while as well. This is something that happens every year...he goes for the summer, but this time he is doing a school year there. He couldn't handle the stresses of the little ones at home and this was for the best.

So I guess technically, after almost a year in the house, I'm down to 3 stepkids

Right now my issues are coming with the twin boys. They are 4 but aren't speaking well yet. They have this "twin-speak" that we are trying to figure out. I keep trying to correct their speech, but it isn't working too well. The "older" twin (he's a bit bigger) is doing much better with speech than the smaller one. Add to that an issue with the smallest one. He became afraid of the toilet in the house (there are 2, but he equated it to the house) because it got clogged. We had to call a plumber in to snake it (I couldn't find anything when I snaked it) and he ended up getting a toothbrush out of the main drain area (past the toilet). This is what caused the clogging. We made sure the young one saw this and that it was alright. He wasn't alright with it. He took the vent cover off in their room and took a dump in the vent and also peed in the vent. We are still trying to get the pee smell out 3 months later. Anyway, he won't use a toilet except to pee now. He will only poo in this little plastic potty. He won't tell anyone he used it though, so the bathroom gets REALLY stinky really fast. I usually go to the bathroom shortly after getting home from work and just about get knocked out of the room by the smell.

There are also eating issues with the young kids. The oldest ones, when they were at home, had eating disorders too. They never stopped eating. The young ones however are on the opposite side, they aren't eating enough. The one will only eat what he wants (usually either toast or cereal...or a granola bar). The other 2 just don't eat much of dinner when it's made. Oh, if it's kraft dinner, they will eat it. Sorry. I forgot that one. So, as the "new" parent in the house I suggested the way I was raised...you sit at the table and eat what is in front of you or you don't get to play. Easy. But I'm told by my FW that this would only lead to negative reinforcement against food and they may end up with eating disorders. I don't want to fight over it, so I don't bring up that they already have eating disorders and aren't getting the nutrients they need. But there we go.

Anyway, that's my LOOOOONG introduction and help questions. If you made it this far, thank you!

Vidar