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Selfish Adult SD showing DH her true colors

Shannon61's picture

DH is returning from a business trip this evening and will need a ride from the airport charter bus depot. The pick-up location doesn't have cabs. I'm attending a function, and won't be available.

So DH called his brother to see if he would pick him up and he couldn't confirm it because he might have to work. So he asked me to ask SD (27) if she had any plans and I did (as he listened on the phone). She said she was going to her grandma's to have/cook dinner. No special plans . .she's just learning how to cook some of granny's specialites. She told me to tell DH she would pick him if he didn't have any other way to get home. Her annoyance was written all over her face and I think DH picked up on it even though he was on the phone. Now mind you she told him before he left to let her know if he needed a ride.

I think DH was hurt by her reluctance and when he gets home I'm going to have to remind him. . this is the daughter that you: go out of your way for, still buy food and other treats for, didn't give a move out date to because you didn't want to hurt her feelings, stopped charging rent when she wasn't working and living off her savings, wanted to give rent money back to when she needed money for a insurance deductible after an accident, and the list goes on and on. I'll also remind him of the time she went to pick BF up from airport and she called DH for directions and he told her exactly where to go, etc.

And this is how she treats dear old dad? He's always been there for her and she can count on him, but it's clear he can't count on her. This is what happens when you coddle/enable your children . . you basically teach them that it's all about them and their needs and it's ok to treat everybody else like a piece of crap. I hope DH has learned something from this.

Comments please.

Shannon61's picture

You are so right. He called me again and I could hear the frustration in his voice. I can't wait to rub it in. And I'll remind him, this is the monster he created. He'll likely say he's going to "talk" to her . . .but it's far too late for that now.

irritatedgal's picture

Uhmm, guys, maybe DH did create a monster, but she's also 27 years old. She has a choice of being selfish or not and SHE'S just as much to blame as dear old dad. Btw...comments please on MY last post? Thanks

Shannon61's picture

I agree. I've known from the start that she was selfish and I'm glad he's finally starting to see it as well.

Shannon61's picture

I agree. I told DH how I felt and he had the nerve to tell me "you should have said something to her." Uhh . . hello, this is your frickkin daugther, not mine. He only said that because he doesn't have the balls to tell her himself. I know myself well enough to know had I said something and she commented w/that sharp tongue, I would have said something I would regret and I don't want to live in a war zone . .again.

Also, his feelings were hurt because she didn't call to talk to him while he was on his business trip and he mentioned that. Her reply was. . you didn't call me either.

Is it just me here but isn't this what small children do? They want to speak to mommy or daddy and say "I read a book in school today about 3 rabbits, blah blah blah or I painted a picture of the merry go round from the circus," etc. He was only gone a few days and it's not like he went off to fight for our country.

I told her he still thinks she's 10 years old . .and the sad thing is she still act like a 10 year old. This girl will be 28 in a few months. Am I the only one who thinks this is pathetic or am I out of touch?

Shannon61's picture

My mother laughed when I told her. I also think it's abnormal, but they have this abnormal . . twisted relationship. It's not healthy. It's not like somebody was sick or in critical . .good grief.

I hope her fiance is ready for this BS. I have a feeling he's not going to think it's cute either.

Done WIth It's picture

Am I the only that read:

1. Wife had a function to attend and couldn't pick up husband.
2. Brother might be working...but call him if no ride.
3. Daughter had made prior plans, but to call her if he needed a ride.

If I were husband, I'd be ticked off with wife and daughter for neither one being there.

Shannon61's picture

DoneWithIt. . DH knew in advance that I couldn't pick him up, that's why SD made the offer. It was between brother, SD or another family member. I was never an option.

lovingmom123's picture

Shannon, you are dealing with the same nonsense I've had for years. Try 31,27, and 25 always expecting their father to be "on call" incase the oldest needs a babysitter or someone to arrange a ride to the airport, or calling the mechanic for their car trouble. These are children in adult bodies.

Karmamom's picture

I see tha same thing happening with my skids and DH as they are growing up.
SS19 only calls when he needs something, and SD22 will call in the middle of the night (!)
if she´s in some situastion she percieves as a "crisis". And they never EVER thank him for anything he does. I´ve been shocked numerous times by their lack of gratitude and manners.
I swear my kids will grow up to learn to be independent and thankful!