Well, it was the worst ever with my DH. I won't even bore anyone with the details because we've all had them. I will tell you it involved yelling, name calling and complete disrespectful behavior. Bummer of it is, I was the one who was acting like a complete lunatic.

My SS has had a problem with boundaries before. A few times in the past (about a year ago) he has hit, pinched (until it left a giant bruise) and been a total jerk to my son. He has accused both his BM and his BD at different times of child abuse. He actually reported his BM to the police and she had to go to court where it was found to be false. After that, he reported my DH twice for abuse to his BM and the parenting coordinator where it was found to be false. He has been reported to CPS for "inappropriate sexual behavior" three years ago by a parent of another student and it was found to be false. He's 14 years old.

He is highly intelligent, has hygiene issues, sits in his room like a recluse, participates in no extra curricular activities and has a reputation at school for being one of the weirdest kids there. His friends that he has are also... um, unusual. He's really into D&D and that's his only interest.

Now that I have made him sound like a freak, I can tell you he really doesn't have behavior problems 95% of the time. He can be very polite albeit distant and makes above average grades at school. He doesn't do drugs, drink and has no behavior problems at school.

The other day he was looking at erotica with a friend and showed my daughter and her friends what they were looking at. Not cool. It's strange considering they really don't get along very well. She's two years older. Last night he was on my computer but made sure to clear the history and created an audio problem (for the umpteenth time) and I freaked out on his Dad. I don't want him sitting in my office looking at porn, which I of course jumped to the conclusion that he was. Who knows. He has lied so much in the past I don't even really care what the truth is.

To make a long story short. It's not just that I don't have warm feelings for this kid, I can't stand him. I wouldn't lose a nights sleep if he never stepped foot back in my house and stayed with his Mom. He is so annoying to be around and my daughter is teased at school because he's now her step brother. I don't know how to let go of old stuff and focus on the positives his behavior. He's weird but things could be so much worse. He has positive attributes and I can't even see them. I'm polite but certainly distant and that's no way to live. I view him as threat to my family. He could get his Dad who's a physician in so much trouble. He could create a custody problem for me if my ex ever gets wind of a report if one is ever made. My DH has told my SS if he ever accuses him again he will not be allowed to live in our home again. (currently 50/50)

I dread the time when he is here, my daughter stays away from the house and there's really not a reason why. He's weird but really doesn't have a behavior problem almost all of the time. How do I move past my bitterness and allow myself to not feel this seething anger when he's here. If something doesn't give, I'm going to be divorced because of it. I can't live this way.