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Sanity check please....Am I being unreasonable?

songchef's picture

Why is it that I am made out to be the bad guy? (or at least feel that way) BF was married to Satan. I kid you not, I have never met someone more vindictive in my life. Its been 3 years since she kicked him out while away on business, moved all his stuff and when he got back got served. Anyway, that is small compared to how she continues to screw him over. BF was not in a good state of mind and signed the final papers (with out a lawyer....BIG mistake) and does not get to see his daughter unless it is at Satans house. She claims he is a drug addict (NOT true at all...she thinks taking a vitiman in from of daughter is wrong kind of deal) and basically has call on who baby sits him while with his daughter. It is only Satan herself, and her parents and his sister who lives 4 hours away.....which Im sorry, but is just way too uncomfortable for him to be with her the X-laws and his sister lives way too far.
Ive known him since high school and we actually almost got married years ago. (another story for another time) But now we are back together. Of course Satan will not allow me into her lair. His daughter is now 9 y/o. In my heart of hearts I really believe that it is actually harmful for her to have Daddy at the marital home. (while under complete control of Satans wishes I may add) Is that crazy? This poor kid is not being allowed to get over this divorce. Satan had told BF that she will take away everything he loves and shes done a great job at it! (he lost EVERYTHING to the tune of over a million) and is back in court at least once a month for 3 frickin years. Still she fights for more when there is nothing left at all. So back to my point, Christmas, ahhh yes, great. His sister set up that they meet at Satans on X-mas eve. We do X-mas eve....I said I think you should call your sister and meet up somewhere, that going to Satans is sending daughter the wrong message. She is struggling with it and its been 3 years! He is going to go to court to change custody but needs to deal with all the other legal BS she is throwing at him currently. SO that could take years. I feel like I am the one stopping him, when I know Im not. He said his sister is always late so he canceled totally. I think its not good but I also am sticking to my guns about going to Satans house. Honestly, I really feel its bad for his daughter. And the fact that Satan has such control over him bothers me. Ive been reading and it doesnt seem there are too many that make it through the blended family thing! My son (14) gets along well with BF and on my end there is no drama. So am I unreasonable here about going to Satans? Not just for X-mas but in general? There ARE other ways to do this until it goes through the courts. Just looking for opinions.

LizzieA's picture

I would let him go this one time, just for SD. Then, please get a barracuda lawyer to tear BM apart. She is treating him like an unfit father with supervised visits.

songchef's picture

She really is Satan. This has been going on for 3 years now and I really dont think its a good idea to be at Satans house. It is telling Satan that she wins again AND not at all good for his daughter. Daughter is very upset and Satan isnt helping by keeping her apart from her father. She needs to know that her Dad has a life and is not what Satan makes him out to be. Im sure Satan is painting a rather ugly picture of me as well.
We have the lawyer now but there are other issues in court mainly about Satan wanting more money, that the lawyer said he needs to deal with this first then we can go for visitation. I would LOVE it if we could go for visitations now. I highly doubt any court in the world would turn him down given how Satan is making it impossible for him to see his daughter.

Pantera's picture

I really don't think its a good idea to do family holidays or family outings/gatherings after the parents are split. It definitely sends mixed signals to the child. Your DH needs to get a lawyer pronto and get this mess settled!!!

"If I turn into another, Dig me up from under what is covering the better part of me" -Incubus