You are here

Changing Visitation

songchef's picture

Submitted by songchef on Tue, 01/05/2010 - 7:19am

Forums: 
Family Court

Has anyone gone back to court to change visitation?
Im not talking about changing custody, just visitation. BF signed divorce papers that no one should have ever ok'ed. He didnt have a lawyer and basically his X got everything. Money and assets aside, the worst part is he can only see his daughter with a family member that his X ok's. (she claims he is a drug addict...not true in the least unless you consider taking an aspirin in front of daughter) So as it stands, its her parents or her that are ok'ed.
He has a lawyer now and currently is fighting out in court additional dramas (his X has taken him back to court at least once a month for 2 years)
His lawyer said they need to work on the house issues so basically they are still on the defense until that gets settled. In the mean time, the only way his X will allow him to see his daughter (who is 9) is at the marital home which of course is not good for anyone. Maybe they should be required to attend mediation. This has been very trying and all consuming. BF is going to take visitation issues back to court and will do anything it takes to get to see his daughter without the control of X.I would hope that the court will see fit to lay the burden of proof on her as well as any costs related to the proof (which again wont be a problem)He was also forced to move out of the second home, which is the current battle, and moved in with me just over the state line, so in a different state. I guess what Im asking is did anyone have luck changing visitations? Do you suppose it would be like custody and have mediation and the whole works? What could be involved in the process?

Catlover's picture

Submitted by Catlover on Tue, 01/05/2010 - 7:43pm

It took us 14 months from the time we filed our motion to request a week on week off placement schedule to the time we went to court. We have 50/50, but felt that having a set schedule would be better than having BM handpick her days with no consideration for us. In that 14 months we had a Guardian ad Litem appointed who came up with a great idea {sarcasm} to have the skids bounce back and forth every other day between houses. We had numerous stipulations go back and forth which were basically us trying to compromise and BM saying "nope...got to be my way or no way".

All in all we spent close to $11,000 to get a court ordered schedule that is worse than what I could have imagined. I guess my personal opinion is a little jaded.

"Just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean people aren't out to get me"

songchef's picture

Submitted by songchef on Tue, 01/05/2010 - 8:11pm

Thanks you guys for the input! I had the feeling it was going to be waaaaay longer then my BF thinks it will be. (by the way, BF because he says if we DO marry she would go for my assets as well)
I know its just the beginning of a loooong and drawn out battle. It still amazes me that some people cant just work things out and do what is best for the kids.....after all, isnt that what it should be? I have never in my life had to deal with such issues (and I myself have been through much much much) but really, when it comes to the kids, it was always on the same page in my experiences.
I just dont get it....but I see it and BF will have to deal with it. I will back him as always, but I also will NOT lose myself in this battle that is not mine. :/ I also ask myself, where AM I in this battle? I dont even know and its all so unreal to me.

How can people make the fight more important then the child? I struggle with that.....

Thanks again and any other input is MORE then welcome! (help) :/