When does she turn 18?

Sounds like the SD hasn't had a lot of experience baby-sitting. Its one of the oldest birth control methods around.

Have you talked to her about the Depo-shot? Its good for 3 months. If she refuses then don't rule out an All-girl boarding school.

Good luck!

here's an afterthought. Have DH talk to the "guy-friend" about his daughter's anti-birth control issues. That should make him run for the hills screaming.

Would it be too out of line to talk to him about this? It sounds like from his text he does not want the responsibility of a child.

She sounds like a future BM. This is what our BM was like, except she started having sex when she was 14! This kind of irresponsible behavior is exactly what leads to teenagers/young people getting pregnant with a guy that doesn't love them or want to marry them and they think that a baby will trap the guy or make them closer and it usually does exactly the opposite. They end up young, single mothers and then get bitter and angry when the father moves on and finds love with someone else. I hope this doesn't happen to your SD, it's pretty serious and it's good that you're taking it so seriously. I think talking to the guy is a great idea! My H bought BMs birth control for her, but she secretly stopped taking it so she would get pregnant and trap him. He was really naive about it and if someone had sat him down and made him realize the risk he was taking by not using condoms and trusting BM to take care of the birth control, he probably wouldn't be in the drama-fest that resulted.

To be honest, pregnancy is definitely a huge concern, but I would actually be a lot more worried about std's especially HIV and Hepatitis. Young, heterosexual women are now the primary group of people that have the highest rate of HIV infections. It only takes one time to become infected. Condoms are the minimum step they should take and both should be tested for HIV and made aware that it takes up to six months after infection for it to show up on the test. The HIV test can't check your blood for HIV itself, but it does check for antibodies and they can take a while to develop. HIV is a scary disease and it's a horrible tragedy when ignorance and irresponsibility make young kids make choices that can lead to an early death after years of suffering. HIV/AIDS is a horrible, devastating disease and parents should educate their kids as much as possible. I grew up in a big city and saw people wasting away from AIDS and had two friends that became HIV positive from one exposure. It ruins your life and changes everything. Because I actually knew and saw people who had it, it was very personally tragic for me and caused me to take it very seriously and always take every precaution related to sex. To me, this and Hepatitis, among other STDs is far scarier than a possible pregnancy.

"If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they will kill you." ~Oscar Wilde

I read your post again and from the looks of it, by what the male friend's text said, we can't determine if he's romantically involved with her. He very well could be a platonic friend looking out for your SD. Its worth a talk to this guy if you know who he is and comes around the place. I wouldn't let on that you've snooped through SD phone and found the text. She'll hide more secrets.

I'm curious as to what your SD is thinking? Does she seriously want kids right now? Or does she feel invincible to pregnancy and disease? The latter can be dealt with a serious talk. If its the former, you might be able to get a court order for depo due to her mental instability. It would take a psych evaluation as well. I'm not sure if your state allows this kind of action but worth looking into.

Call the school counselor and inform them what's going on. Some schools have counselor programs where they assign a buddy (usually a senior but sometimes a junior student) to talk to another student who's having problems. She'll more likely open up to a fellow classmate then an adult. I had a "buddy" assigned to me way back in my highschool days. I was at a low point in my young life and someone anonomous noticed and alerted the counselor. That girl, don't remember her name now, helped me sort out things I wouldn't have otherwise. If no buddy system, then some kind of therapy.