Not only am I new to this site, I am also new to this whole step-parenting thing. It has turned out to be a wonderful and eye-opening experience! My SD is 4 and turning 5 in two weeks. My DH has always been a great daddy, and since we've been together we've been able to take SD a couple more days a week, she has a bigger house to play in, and another family (mine parents) to love her. In the begining of my DH and my relationship he cheated on me, with BM. She does want him back, but he has let her know that what they did was wrong and he regrets it, and he has done everything possible to show me how sorry he is. I have gained my trust back, but every now and then something comes up with BM that requires a 'sit down' talk with the adults. After the cheating happened (it was in their old house which the BM still lives in) I had asked him to never go to that house again. And he agreed, and this hasn't been a problem...so far. BM called today and said she is having SD's birthday party at her house. I have offered to pay to have party at an indoor or outdoor facility...basically anywhere but that house. She will not compromise, and it just feels like she is trying to keep us (BF and myself, mostly me) away. Now we are having to have a separate party and this upsets SD. I am willing to be the bigger person and show up anyways, but 5 year olds can be perceptive, I don't want her to sense all that anger and hurt on her birthday. Any ideas? Am I wrong for thinking this way?