I'm a 33yo male living with my girlfriend 41, and at the time of writing, her teen daughter.  When my GF first begged to me move in with her, her two older teen boys also lived there making it 4 people in the house total.  Her kids are now 21, 20, and 17.  It was the first time not living with my parents, so I was nervous and a little apprehensive about moving into someone else's house, especially when they have 3 kids.  Not that I have a problem with young teens or kids, I do very well and honestly, growing up in a home that was a daycare for kids of all ages, I could definitely raise a child  a lot better than some of the ones that actually have one given I have the resources.  I'm not talking down about other parent just giving context, I have lots of experience with children and teens.

Looking back at the beginning not, I definitely should have got out way before any of this relationship melted into this mess.  I should have listened to my brain when it told me to think it through more because it might not be a good thing to take it to the next step.  Plus when we first met she was still married, it was abusive and not a good situation. That should have been my first sign not to go to the next step, but again I ignored it because I loved her.  Now I feel like I'm stuck and I don't know what to do or how to go about doing it.  Mix that with. My mental health and you got a mixture for a good show.  She told me after we had been together for a few months that she had mental health issues as well, which I was fine with because, I can jusge someone for something I have too.  At close to maybe 6 months to a year in, things were really horrible.  She says she doesn't remember, but I most certainly do.  I was in a long bout with my depression, six or more years of feeling like complete shit. And her body decided that it wasn't going to be shown up by my MD, so it kicked in high gear and took us for a hell of a ride.  But being raised the way I was and being the person I am, I wouldn't give up on her, and I didn't.  Almost a year of her constant breakdowns I had to endure.  Ugh it was miserable all the crying and positive reinforcement, and just basically trying to do everything I could to help her get through with hurting herself.  In dealing with her, I couldnt really focus on getting myself better. But again, I needed someone special and I loved her so I didn't think about it.  But it was probably one of the hardest things I've had to deal with, my mind trying to kill me, and hers trying to kill her. I'm not sure how I made it past that.

Now, all this time I had never met her kids.  She talked about them but I never met them.  The things she told me we're mostly good, the rest sounded like normal teen stuff. Again no problems with kids, just the way they were raised.  So after a lot of poking and begging me to come live with her, I agreed and we talked about all the things we needed everyone to do to make things run smoothly.  The rest we would work out as problems or whatever would arise.  I went over to meet her kids in person for the first time.  They seemed nice, good looking kids, we talked a little and I was surprised that they already knew I was going to move jn. One of my worries was that I was just talking the spot of he ex and I didn't want them to feel like I live here now, I control the house, so I treated them like I would want to be treated. I knew that this wasnt Really my house, I'm basically a tenet.  I gave them privacy, if they needed help I helped,  I helped cook, clean, helped with homework, took them places, I pay a majority of the families really high rent and help with other things if they need me too. and I dealt with listening to their family issues and constant fighting.  And once I moved in they basically never talked to me.  I would try to ask them questions to get to know them, but it didn't work.  Half the time they didn't even speak to me.  That should have been a red flag.

But again I loved her and I don't like to give up on things just because they are hard so I let it go best I could.  Until it got worse and I found out the families true colors.  I also found out that these kids were not the same as the ones she had told me so much about.  They had no structure, they talked to their mom howeithey wanted including cussing, yelling, lying, the daughter turned out to be a clepto.  These kids did whatever they wanted whenever they wanted, no real rules.  Now I'm very understanding, I'm chill and try to keep myself calm and I usually get along with everyone. But I'm living with these people now, and I have to deal with it.

This is only the beginning, but it was new so I wanted to give it a chance