Just a rant
My SS doesn't know he's his own person!
We have SKs 2nd part of Christmas break so they are here now.
This 17 year old answers almost every question with "WE". For example when asked if his Information came back yet about financial aid, the response "WE haven't looked at it yet".When asked how Senior pics turned out .."WE are still deciding which ones to get". When asked about 1st semester of college plans etc, "WE" aren't sure yet!
I'm going to scream "is there a mouse in your pocket"the very next time he answers this way!
This kid has no idea how to be his own person! FFS!!!
- ICanMakeIt's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
"And would that be the Royal
"And would that be the Royal 'we'? "
oh for sure.
oh for sure.
LOL
LOL
I assume he's referring to BM
I assume he's referring to BM? If you have a good relationship with him, do ask if he has a mouse in his pocket, as a joke, and see if it triggers any thought on the matter (doubtful but at least you don't have to bite your tongue).
I've gently inquired "who's
I've gently inquired "who's we?" and he clams up. I know he means BM.
Flip it and follow up with,
Flip it and follow up with, which one do you like? What would you like to do for first semester college plans? He will then start to understand your asking about his personal opinion, desires, wants.
If only....the child can not
If only....the child can not think for himself. I swear it is painful to witness. I've asked a million times over the years to get his wants and desires. I even offered multiple choice and that gets a "maybe" or "not really". It is mind numbing.
This is a very frustrating
This is a very frustrating thing to go through. When OSS got out from underneath ET (BM), his inability to make decisions was extreme and exhaustive. He had issues picking out soap at the store because there were so many options and no one there to tell him which one to grab.
DH started calling it out. He stopped doing things for the boys if they didn't directly ask, and he took their word to him over anything ET or anyone else said. If the boys didn't decide on something, they just didn't get the thing until they could decide. DH also made it safe for them to tell him "no" or their real thoughts on something, and he called out the "we" and "well mom said..." stuff.
It's brutal to combat and sad to see. Thank god ET continues to eff up enough that both kids seem to be breaking away and telling her their opinions more and more.
It's combatted with the long
It's combatted with the long distance situation, but one day I sure hope his eyes open. I have zero actual hope though.
The kid didn't even pick his own career for goodness sakes.