Divorce advice?
So my father is aligned with me and my family. Mother is enmeshed with my brother across the country. Basically my brother is going belly up money and career wise and my mother now has drained my parents retirements and they in their 80's. Now my mother is trying to get a reverse mortgage to siphon money off the home my father lives in.
Crazyily? She has flown cross country by herself ( was terrified of flying?) and is staying at the house for a few days to attempt this and she wants deed? My father is at my house now and won't speak with her. He doesn't want the house touched.
war of the roses? She has racked up over 100k debt to pay for freeloading son. Unfortunately father owns half that debt.
My family now are thinking my father gets a divorce. No fault.
wow. But really they have been living separately for 5-6 yrs now. My mother left to become a house frau for her pampered son and his child. He treats her like dirt and and she also dishes out abuse.
so does my father proceed with divorce? My son wants to take gpa down to bank and open his own acct and keep his social security away from her.
it's started. And I don't like it. Just want to never see my mother and brother again. Any thoughts?
My kids
Are all adults and I really don't want them involved. But one was a target of smear campaign and feels hostile to his uncle and grandmother now.
Real benefit is
To stop the bleeding of the money. My father says checks are bouncing again this month.
this would end the debt that is just out of control. My mother told me she is no longer paying on bills. Said she will be dead before they sue her. Unreal. My brother already is being sued by multiple creditors. They are in panic mode I am sure.
Dad should lawyer up
Lawyer time for dad. This is above all your pay grades.
Your Dad needs to contact a lawyer ASAP.
Your Dad needs to contact a lawyer ASAP. And I agree with your son, the first thing he should do is move whatever money he can to a place where she can't touch it - at the very least his social security checks.
Dad should get an attorney -
Dad should get an attorney - but she is entitled to some of his money, including part of his social security. I'd involve adult protective services. Your brother is financially abusing your mother, and your mother is financially abusing your father. At the most, help dad pay for an attorney to protect himself.
This!!!
Make a call immediately to social services. This is elderly abuse. Next, call an attorney. And definitely get an account set up for your dad so his Social Security checks and any retirement can deposit there without the mother being able to touch it. Do all of this and do it fast.
WOW.
That really and truly sucks. For you, for your father, all of it.
Get an attorney ASAP. Try to go as no contact as you can and get the separate account set up.
Your Dad Must Close Accounts & Take Control Of The Finances
Most likely she's gotten other credit card debt he doesn't even know about.
I know when I was divorcing my kids BF, everything was "FROZEN" and nobody could use the credit cards, even though our kids were school aged. When DH was getting divorced, his wife drained ALL BANK ACCOUNTS, safe deposit boxes, cleared the house of all the furniture, & took out almost 80K in credit cards and maxed them out without him knowing it. He tried taking her off AMEX and other cards, and since he was the primary card holder and she was only an authorized user, he was able to do that, BUT she had a bulldog of an attorney who MADE HIM PUT HER BACK ON. This is highly unusual by the way. She charged NO LESS than 10k A MONTH on JUST THE AMEX, furnishing her new home and apartments for all of her kids. He was made to pay it all off, IN ADDITION to getting bled dry in other areas.
Please, get your dad to an expert divorce attorny. It is IMPERATIVE he get proper representation and end this money hemorrhage! I feel so sorry for him and what he's got coming if he doesn't.