SS13 brat, cat and broken vase. Opinions please!
SS13 was playing video games in the living room and I was sitting reading a book in my chair. SS13 has been told NO Roughhousing with our large dog in the living room as things have gotten broke. Well SS13 in between playing video games threw a "loud Squeaky toy" across the living room to get the dog going crazy. This flipped out the cat who was sleeping which in turn caused the cat to madly run out of the living room. Well in doing so the cat knocked a vase of the coffee table and it broke.
Of course SS13 took NO responsibility and I was the one who cleaned up the mess. DH was not home at the time. I told SS this is the reason we don't Roughhouse with the dog in here and SS rudely answered back "no...this is the reason you should not have anything breakable in here".
When DH got home I told him what happened and what SS said to me. DH basically took SS side! DH told me there is plenty of times the cat flips out and it could have happened to any of us. AND said maybe I should remove any breakables to avoid this happening in the future. OMFG I wanted to smack DH! Like really??? Now I don't know if DH really believes what he said or just telling me this so he does not have to deal with Discipline SS over this. DH is a typical Disney daddy.
So I'm so pissed off over this. Honestly can you see DH side on this?? If you do please share with me as it's really getting under my skin!
Uh. What about his feral ass
Uh. What about his feral ass brat smarting off?
This is not the kind of crap I can deal with in my home. From both kid and father. Hell no.
DH lame ass excuse to that is
"He's stuck in the middle".. Um hello I'm your adult wife not another kid. When I complain about SBrats rudeness to me DH tells me I put him in the middle
DH is the one putting you in
DH is the one putting you in the middle. He needs to be putting his kill behaved spawn in his place. Which is at the bottom of relationship priorities in the blended family.
I can't wrap my head around
I can't wrap my head around SS smarting off to you and your DH blaming you for things breaking.
So I guess the next thing to do is remove the game console since it's breakable, right? Bye bye so long too bad so sad.
Oh em gee I could not live like this.
Hell no!
The video game was my idea to keep SBrat in one place and some what Quiet. Without video games SBrat would be running/screaming full on throughout the whole house leaving behind a trail of Destruction.
I would be livid!! SKs used
I would be livid!! SKs used to do this when younger with my dogs then oldest would always try to fight them because they wanted to play because he egged them on, wth!
Thankfully DH put his foot down with SKs because if I had to correct them about messing with my dogs at the time someone was getting a boot in the rear.
Sounds like DH needs to get a bigger earful about your SS and if he doesn't correct his spawn than he can clean/replace the messes from now on!
IMO, SS should get
IMO, SS should get consequences for breaking a rule, and DH should get an earful for empowering his son to break rules - but my first thought was, Why do they have a vase on the coffee table if they have a large dog and a cat?
Me too
I understand there was a rule that was broken and hence there should be consequences, and SS should not be mouthing off regardless.
But if it were living room that vase would have been doomed between my 2 cats running around and SO and my general clumsiness!
I cannot see DH side on this.
I cannot see DH side on this. DS has broke many things and either has to pay for them or work off the cost.
1. Because he didn't listen.
2. Because was being careless.
My rule you break it, you buy it.
Did your husband really say
Did your husband really say you should baby proof for a teenager??
Uggghh.. Your SS was being a
Uggghh.. Your SS was being a smart aleck...
But... to an extent when you have young kids, animals in your home.. you have to be extra mindful of where breakable items may be. I know the impetus was the kid tossing a toy for the dog.. but could he have naturally predicted the dog would go all crazy for it? that the cat would go off like that? I mean.. if the dog and cat are that tightly wound.. then I would probably not have them in areas with things that could get damaged.
I think it IS a lesson that SS should learn that rules are for a reason.. roughhousing in the house with the dog is not permitted.. and perhaps he can replace the vase? He also needs to understand that the adults in the home make the rules.. and it's not his place to second guess everyone. Your DH seems to be putting you and his son on kind of even ground.. when he should be backing you up regarding the backtalk on the issue (even if he does somewhat agree that having fragile items in areas where the animals could access them is a potential issue).
Banish the game console &
Banish the game console & Skid to their room. If they want to behave like heathens they can do it away from common areas. Banish DH from the bedroom for not respecting his wife & teaching SS it is OK to disrespect you. He can sleep in the common area.
Teen attitude
should NOT be tolerated. Its more than just the broken vase its his talking back and your dH not backing you up.
Meh, I actually agree with
Meh, I actually agree with the kid and your DH. Who in their right mind has any breakables around with pets, especially a large dog. I have two large active Weimaraners and two cats, you bet your behind my house is completely pet-proofed and I don't have young teens that could get the impulse to play with the dog. Our dogs wrestle between them all the time. Sometimes the cats flip for no apparent reason, a sudden movement can do it, a loud noise, etc.. Was he a bit of a smart ass answering? Yeah but he didn't insult you and spoke his mind in what he found a pretty ridiculous thing in a typical teenage fashion. If it were your own kid your reaction wouldn't be as severe. I don't know if he has dogs at a friends house or his moms in which the house is dog proofed?
Your DH could have told him to not be a smart ass but he IS entiteld to have a different opinion then yours, even if it sides with the kid. Again, not when it comes to the kids behavior-that's when parents need to be united front...but this is a seperate 'house' things that he disagree with.
For some reason this reminded me of my cousin- when we both had babies the same age starting to crawl around. She insisted on keeping all this fine china/delicate displays of stuff and just smack the babies hand eachtime it went to explore said intriguing items. I found that stupid, I removed mine as to remove the risk of injury and constant battle with a 1 year old who is just doing what kids that age do.
I think your reaction is a little extreme personally, especially because I see it as very irrational to have delicates where pets can break them. This could have happened even when nobody is home and pets can then cut themselves on said vase. Other then a typical bratty teen response, I've gotta side with them on this one.
If you can't have 'breakable
If you can't have 'breakable things' in the living room, well it's a shame that the TV is breakable, the video game player breakable.
Well I would take DH and SS at their word and remove all breakable items from the living room until DH understand that there is no whining about being in the middle. And he's an adult and therefore he needs to be an adult and parent his child and put in consequenses for bad behaviour.