I think my SD is showing signs of narcissistic behavior...not sure about the empath part, but I can tell you that I find both her and MIL (definitely narc-y) completely mentally draining to be around in general.

DH does not really get it and I honestly dont understand how he can handle being around them for long periods of time either. The only thing I can say I've really learned is how to set better boundaries for myself and to be less of a people pleaser.

My ex-SD is a bona fide psychopath.
Normal people and nutjobs don't mix well - no matter what the combination.

During the years I've been a member here, I've always referred to the BM in my life as NPD BM, because she ticks so many boxes as a narcissist.  I should know, I was brought up by two of them, and married one the first time around.  Children of narcissists often end up one of two ways, as narcs themselves, or else with very over developed emotional antennae, with which to anticipate narcs' behaviour, feelings and needs,  and try and keep themselves out of trouble.  These people are sometimes called empaths, and often end up in caring professions of one sort or another, as I did.  

Narcissists frequently home in on empaths, because they are eminently exploitable for so-called narcissistic supply, and don't have very good personal boundaries.  I have spent the last 10 yrs improving my boundaries, but they are still only so-so.  

The best book I've read on the subject, is called "The Empathy Trap - Understanding Antisocial Personalities" by Jane McGregor.  

I feel things very deeply. I used to be a 911 operator because I am good at calming people and I like to help people. Having narcissists in my life was soul crushing . It’s been a journey to learn strong boundaries and to not be used 

When your step kid or birth child is a asocial /npd? Or should we say shows the signs in our opinion? 

My SS19 is defo asocial, that's been proved. His sister is a raging covert narc/histrionic and I believe both of them inherit it from the BM. BM's father was the same I'm told.

But what can we do? My DH suffers as the victim of the pycho, only a day ago getti g manipulated into doing his will then sneeringly discarded when psycho had got what he wanted. After psychos trial period at his work is over he is Out.

I am disengaged. I hate that waste of skin. I think 'normal' people feel uncomfortable around them like I do. My DH never seems to see it until he has been caught out, used and thrown away yet again.

Although I'm 95% disengaged I do enjoy the occasional reminding to SS that he does not get I internet usage here because he is a pervert and we dont want that usage associated with our Isp number.

I guess my DH is an empath if he keeps falling for it. I thought he was just an eternal optimist and a nice guy. I think he's just soft. 

Yes, I am the generous empath cheerleader encourager. My SS19 is the son of a covert narcissist.... unsure if he's a narc because he is kind (animals, little children, neighbors) but is also selfish & 100% okay with lying & manipulating. Yet he is also a primary victem of his BM's narcissism, and grew up with bad behavior being "the norm."

Living with that for so many years made me jaded, and I slept with one ear open the whole time SS lived with us. I got burnt out on being used & lied to. 

Very traumatizing. 

Dysfunctional just like her. My husband has been so used to this behaviour for 26 yrs that being with a sane normal empathetic person like me conflicts things for him more.

when i cried because of it he feels guilty and hurt and upset because he’s stuck in the middle of this dysfunctional shithole exwife and skids continue to bring along

i have removed myself and my kids from it..