Am I just an evil SM after all?

Let me first say that I really am a kind, pleasant person in real life. I am not horrible to SD but I have been more direct and impatient with her lately. Well DH picked her up from BM's last night and talked to her. He said that he is really displeased with her attitude and general dislike for anything that doesn't suit her. Of course, BM just stood in silence and kept telling SD that "they love her". I'm surprised it wasn't the water works as per usual.

When they walked in, SD says "hey, dogs, I'm sorry about this morning". I say ok, thanks. She asks what's for dinner and is cheery. I had eaten because it was almost 9pm and I told her there were spaghetti and meatballs in the crock pot. She and DH talked at the dinner table and she came in before bed and said something about the "yanny/ laurel" thing online and we talked for a minute then said goodnight.

DH said that she "doesn't know how to act" sometimes but she is trying. Ok, who's fault is that, DH? This could've been nipped in the bud a year or two ago. Anyway, this morning I get up to walk the dogs, she says good morning and I invite her. She politely declines so I tell her there is yogurt and cereal for her and that we can make bacon and eggs when I get back. Ok, I'll take the bait. She is at an awkward stage and I want to be understanding. New beginnings, anyone?

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Comments

New beginnings, everyday is a

New beginnings, everyday is a new beginning. I think SD is at an awkward stage and you are going to have bad days and good days. The key is to not let her get to you. I think you are pretty much on to her and you are a smart woman. I say go with the flow on the good days. Let your DH handle her on the bad days. If you think you can control this child it is not going to happen. You can only control the way you handle yourself when the bad days happen.

You are so right that I can

You are so right that I can only manage myself and my emotions. The problem is that I am so emotional and take a lot of things to heart. I always have. I care about SD so much and have been around for more than half her life! She doesn't remember a lot of the things we've done together because she was so little when they happened. But you're right that every day is a new beginning and I feel much better today than yesterday.

Give yourself some credit.

Give yourself some credit. You are a SM that truly cares about your SD. She is a lucky child. I am glad you feel better today.

I really do care about her

I really do care about her and would like to work on helping her become an independent young lady and separate myself if she is becoming difficult. She helped me make turkey bacon and scrambled eggs with cheese this morning and it was delicious!

I think all kids have

I think all kids have "moments" just like all adults have "moments" but as Queen said, every day is a new beginning. Kudos to your DH and SD for putting forth the effort to make a happy household. Now, if they can just keep up that momentum, maybe it WILL be a catalyst for change?

I am definitely hoping that

I am definitely hoping that this really is the start of a new family dynamic. SD really is a good kid but she is BM's kid and BM is unpredictable. I don't trust that woman farther than I can throw her. DH has also been an ostrich so I pray that everything can be "normal" for the rest of SD's middle school/ high school career.