SS6 does this all the time. Sometimes I will say, I'M RIGHT HERE, HELLO?!?!?!?! Which pisses Dh off since I am supposed to be the adult, but DH doesn't correct him which is where more of my anger comes from - I mean, how friggin RUDE.

Often on top, DH ignores him completely, not even giving him the answer, so SS6 will repeat it - again, as if I am not there. I swear my head is going to explode one of these days.

That and SS6 always asking when he is going back to BMS (he is with us 50% of the time) and when informed when he will be going back, he cheers. YEEEEEAAAHHHHHH!

That one makes me want to backhand him so he has a reason to cheer about going to BMs. lol

SS knows exactly what he is doing and DH is allowing it by not correcting him which = I support you in treating my wife like shit. Read Stepmonster by Wednesday Martin and make DH read it too.

What's going on with him is anxiety based. He is whoever he is, good/bad, whatever. But he does not feel comfortable relating to you directly. That is not his fault or yours. Imagine trying to make sense of mom/dad not together, another woman in the house with whom he does not have the same kind of comfort zone, whether that comfort zone is good or bad. What you may have is a sensitive young step son who does not know how to navigate this. A woman who his dad is in love with, attracted to looks like a very powerful thing to a kid. And she is. Cut him some slack, just relate to him directly and just show him by example that he can do the same. And go bowling, and have fun.

Same issue here. My dh will actually say "ask her", but she still does it. She also has a habit of pretending I don't exist when dh is talking to me. He'll ask me a question or tell me something and she will respond as though he is speaking to her. About everything. She will do this if he is talking to me about work (we work in the same industry). He will tell me he saw so and so at a confernce and she'll respond with "oh, did they ask to see pictures of DS". Or he'll ask me a question about ds (because, you know, I am his MOTHER and I spend most of my time with him) and she'll answer him. That shit drives me bat shit crazy and dh does ignore that. He thinks ignoring her is sending her a message. Yes, it is - it says "its ok to pretend I am talking to you"

sd19 never talked about me like i wasn't there, but what annoyed me is anytime we had plans to go anywhere, she would always say "are you going too, bi?" why the hell would i NOT be going, dumb ass? i am the woman in this family, but yeah, i'm staying home while everyone else goes to wherever. i'm sure she was just hoping i would say no. one time she asked that when we were taking her and bd to the fair. on MY dime. i am the one who saved back the money to take them. when she asked me if i was going too, i took pleasure in responding with "i guess if you want to go, i HAVE to go since i'm the one paying for it!" it's nice to let her know sometimes that not everything is dad's doing. in fact, almost nothing was ever his doing, f'g ingrate brat.

Geesh! Glad to know I'm not alone!

WOW!!!! I hate I missed this conversation! My SD14 did this same crap too! "Dad, is Barbara going with us?" WTF! Used to piss me off to no end. What I finally did was look at her dad and brother at the dinner table and say, "Can you two help me understand why she asks questions about me in the third person as though I am not sitting at the table with her as opposed to just asking me directly?" Then I turned and looked her square in the eyes. It stopped. I can agree there is probably some measure of anxiety involved, but I can just about bet the kid thinks if you weren't in the picture, mom and dad would be together! They always want them together and I get that.