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I'm having Issues

HeatherM's picture

Submitted by HeatherM on Mon, 12/06/2010 - 11:07am

I can no longer stand to watch SS9 eat. I can't stand watching him eat anything.. .even an apple. I know this is my problem... I just felt like venting about it.. because it really gets to me. Anytime food is discussed, eaten, prepared, SS gets soo excited, dances around the kitchen... my god, I can't handle it. His whole life evolves around food... my pantry, fridge, and cupboards are all locked up with deadbolts... This weekend I was making his dad a Tomato and Bacon sandwich... so of course SS wanted one... and he was so excited to have Bacon.. and when I placed it in front of him..he was soo excited he couldn't even sit still! This just disturbs me so much! He has no other interests... he's getting so big.. he's in counselling right now.. so his parents have chosen to turn the other cheek and let the counsellor deal with all of his issues.. his lying, stealing, cheating, eating... I said "You still have to discipline poor behaviour"... but whatever... they don't... Its not like I can vent about this at home.. so that is why I'm doing it here. Last night we dropped SS off at his Mothers..and he did not want to go.. turns out he did not want to go because Last week he polished off a 2 litre bucket of Ice Cream on his own..and he was to be grounded this week... ah well.. can't wait to see him pig out for the holidays.. DH has even asked that I don't give the kids treats over Christmas because of SS... and although he may have a point.. it pisses me off because my other children don't 'gorge' on their treats!! And they deserve them! It's Christmas!

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helena_brass's picture

Submitted by helena_brass on Mon, 12/06/2010 - 11:50am

Okay, I've actually been around a couple kids like this (not BF's kids thank god), and from my experience I 100% agree with you. It is just sickening to watch them eat because they're SO friggin obsessed with food. It's not the eating itself that kills you though; there's just something so deeply disturbing about seeing a kid (or anyone?) THAT excited about bacon/food. Then you get to the point where you just want to restrict them from eating even one of the "goodies" (hey locked pantries) and every time they are given one it's like you just took a loss in some game you didn't know you were playing.

I know it's not really their faults, and you feel like the biggest a**hole in the world for even having these feelings. I mean, it's awful when you get to the point that it upsets you just to watch the kid eating anything. Kids like this do have a problem, clearly. I think the feelings of repulsion on your part are just an inner recognition of this fact (and perhaps also that any time you provide the kid with food you feel you are contributing to this problem).

Because the parents have let this problem escalate out of control, it will take a disproportionately large concerted on everyone's part to stop it. It will never end if there's not a clear change in the kid's lifestyle early on (um, hello, obesity epidemic). I'm sorry that you have to deal with this, and that your kids are being restricted because SS's parents didn't teach him self control. Maybe request he see a counselor--or a dietitian. As SS gets older it's really going to be hard for him to deal with this--both mentally and physically. The food addiction will become more ingrained, and he will probably feel bad about himself socially if he's larger (possibly leading to more comfort food?). Early help is in his and everyone else's best interest.