If one spouse is on their first marriage and the other on their second ...

So, which statistic applies if one spouse is on their first marriage and the other is on their second (third, fourth, etc....) as far as longivity of the marriage and risk of divorce?

And, if the BioParent you are married to was not married to the other bio parents of your Skid what the hell does that mean statistically speaking as far as longivity of the current marriage.

I am on my second marriage. XW and I did not spawn. My wife was an out-of-wedlock teen mom and had our kid (my Skid) at 16.

How screwed are we?????? :?

Just wondering?

Best regards.

Rags's blog
Log in or register to post comments

Comments

Rags hon, some things

Rags hon, some things completely defy statistics!!!
And I think you and your lovely wife definitely fit into that category… I’d put your relationship against any one on the book that is statistically “perfect”!!!

I’d give it a 100% rate of success!

I'm with Moon Child... Screw

I'm with Moon Child... Screw the statistics... make your own way! I'm pretty sure from what I have read of your postings that you & your wife do just that. After all statistics just tell us what is average, not what we should expect from ourselves Cause by the stats, FDH & I will never make it... It will be the 2nd marriage for both of us. But we know the stats are wrong for us, because this is the marriage that is going to last. We love every day together, and if you have that, as it seems you do, then who cares what everyone else's problems are

this is my first marriage

this is my first marriage w/no kids, dhs 2nd marriage with a baggage set of 2 not including bm....

i think we'll make it, but who knows what is in our cards.

Those stats are driven

Those stats are driven primarily by two things:

1. The f'd up dynamic of bringing kids from ANY prior relationship, and that parent not understanding the concept of what it means to "put the child first" (which means parent will have less money to blow frivolously on self when child needs food/clothes etc. - it does NOT mean child suddenly has decision power in all things for himself, his parents, and adult relationships)

2. The notion that the person involved no longer lives the fairytale idea that marriage is a "forever" or "one time only" event. Once you reconcile that it's "ok" to end a marriage, you lose that sense that you better make it work cuz you took vows.

These two scenarios in concert are what drives the stats of failed mulitple marriages. The fact that you dont have kids from before, but she wasnt married before probably HELPS, but nothing is a guaranteed success or failure. No matter what, you just have to keep it real and work on it.

Like

*Like*

Let's not

Let's not forget....statistics are designed to categorize facts for things that have already happened. So they are true...just put together in whatever way to show the purpose for the study like you said. So its hard to debate that no matter how you slice it, there is enough evidence of failed marriage data to fill 30 oceans!

With that said, it's not ever a fail-safe predictor of anything, and its highly unlikely that many people will match the criteria exactly, so variances are always expected.

NOT trying to open any can of

NOT trying to open any can of worms or anything, but I couldnt resist......gay people everywhere must be scoffing at us for being so "against" something and willing to throw it away, while they fight fight fight in order to be ALLOWED to marry!! I ask myself WHY?!?!?! lol Who the heck would wanna jump on THAT bandwagon?! eeeks...I"m with ya...marriage is not lookin too appealing to me either!

Like

*Like*

Shitfire… DH and I are each

Shitfire… DH and I are each on our third marriages…

Marriage 1: Each married our high school sweetheart… each learned the person you are at 18 is NOT the person you’ll grow to become.

Marriage 2: Each married the polar opposite of our abusive high school sweethearts… mousy, wishy washy weights around our waists… secure in many ways, but rendering us unable to fly.

Marriage 3: As Baby Bear said… “Mmmmmmmmm Just Right!”
Let’s hope those stats are BS and third time’s the charm!

Thanks for everyones thoughts on the topic.

Best regards.

LOL... Rags, You seem like a

LOL... Rags, You seem like a really nice guy. It also seems like youre well educated, romantic and realistic. PLUS you always talk about your wife. I think yall have pretty good odds.