Just an update to my post of last week..
Where SS8 lied to his mother about having been 'beat up' by my bioson 13...
So... I find out this weekend how it all went down... BM asked SS to clean his room... (A week after Grandpa/or I left two fingermark bruises on his side from wrestling/tickling him)... SS tells BM he can't because he's in too much pain... as my BS beat him up... so BM see's the bruises and calls my DH...and also tells DH that SS said he told his dad but his dad didn't care... so DH rushes over to BM's house to comfort SS and tell him he cares about him, and everything will be ok.
I almost vomited.
When FIL and I noticed the bruises (two finger marks) on SS whilst he had his shirt off in the backyard...we asked him "oops does it hurt?", "we didn't mean too", to which SS replied 
he didn't even know they were there...and it was ok because it wasn't bothering him....
This weekend DH 'advised' me, that him and BM think that my son's presence in their sons life is 'detrimental' to his confidence and development, and that my son is the reason that their son is overweight, lies, and pee's himself...
I'm am too choked to tell you all the words I want to say... all I know is that in order to protect my son... I will be switching things around so that we don't have them at the same time, etc, etc... I told my DH that he and his First wife could go F themselves.
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Are you able to have FIL
Are you able to have FIL speak to dh also. Face these issues directly. get a therapist involved to protect not only you but your son.
My biod. who is 2 years younger than ss got screamed at and sworn at by mIL when I was gone at work. Hubby even said that she was out of line but he was unable to get to the room where she was yelling at my daughter. She did not care that there was a grapefruit size bruise left on her by her older stepsibling who was 10 (her grandchild). ss admitted to the school therapist that he had gotten mad at stepsib.and had kicked her with his boots on and then his younger sister threw an empty bookbag at him. He admitted that he had not been hurt and that step sibling had not hit him. MIL continues to believe all of his stories, she gives him money all of the time and will purchase gifts for only him but not even his biobrother her other grandchild.
If hubby will not support you and all of the children as a family and treat each as equals, goodluck from someone who has had to learn the hard way that this situation may never change and it really doesnt matter how much I have been put through. Makes me sick to my stomach.
Are you able to have FIL
Are you able to have FIL speak to dh also. Face these issues directly. get a therapist involved to protect not only you but your son.
My biod. who is 2 years younger than ss got screamed at and sworn at by mIL when I was gone at work. Hubby even said that she was out of line but he was unable to get to the room where she was yelling at my daughter. She did not care that there was a grapefruit size bruise left on her by her older stepsibling who was 10 (her grandchild). ss admitted to the school therapist that he had gotten mad at stepsib.and had kicked her with his boots on and then his younger sister threw an empty bookbag at him. He admitted that he had not been hurt and that step sibling had not hit him. MIL continues to believe all of his stories, she gives him money all of the time and will purchase gifts for only him but not even his biobrother her other grandchild.
If hubby will not support you and all of the children as a family and treat each as equals, goodluck from someone who has had to learn the hard way that this situation may never change and it really doesnt matter how much I have been put through. Makes me sick to my stomach.
BM says I'm the one "making"
BM says I'm the one "making" Sd pee her pants, lol. I wish I had that much power! Imagine if someone was making me mad I could just point my finger at them and they would pee themselves. DH and I laugh at BM's foolishness. I would honestly leave him if he bought into her crap.
This would be a defining
This would be a defining moment for me. I would make sure that they are never together. Whatever that meant for me. I don't want to ever make my son feel like I treat him less than my number one priority. BM did something earlier in the year that affected my kid and we are still playing out the drama she caused.
I am sorry your husband is not seeing this for what it is. A scapegoat. Your priority has to be your child not your stepchild.
Trust me... my son is my
Trust me... my son is my first priority. As luck would have it my ex husband is smarter than my current one ;)... so he is on board with helping me make the 'schedule' so that I can keep these kids a part. I just wonder after a few months...if my son isn't the scapegoat..who the scapegoat will be. Me? His two year old sister? One would never know... I mean just last week DH said that one of the reasons SS is overweight is that DH spends too much time with our two year old? Whatever... trust me jsmom..it is a defining moment for me..but I'm not too sure that I like what it 'defines'. Violet - My FIL is too old to get involved..he wouldn't even understand what the real issue was and with my luck he'd forget the bruises altogther....My DH has for a long time now treated my BS like he doesn't belong...and this has caused many an issue... one major one is that my BS lives with his Dad the majority of the time now because he can't stand it any longer...and well nor can I... and although my DH know's he's done wrong.. for some reason he's not able to fix it... Crayon... I do not want their child influencing mine anymore either... unfortunatly I also have a bio daugther...luckily she is two yet.. but still ... I had daydreams the other day (you know when you're supposed to be working and are thinking of other things)..that if I eventually leave my DH I would ask that he get visitation with our daughter when he does NOT have his son. And juju...no.. it would seem DH thinks BM is a wonderful and brilliant person... I asked him the other day why he didn't just work things out with her... Now, I love my DH. I cannot imagine my life without him... having said that however... everyone has limits.