bm is crazy! she's still in love with dh
im in another town away from dh right now finishing school while he's taking on a new job closer to sd. he was dropping off sd to bm and they had like an hour conversation. she was calling me a bitch the whole time hahaha. dh kept trying to bring back the conversation to sd and custody issues they are about to undergo. its obvious that she is jealous that dh married me and not her. she said that i cant cook or clean like her. hahah whatev she doesnt even know. she wants what i have. Her and dh's relationship was not good at all. they were together for 6ish years and it was bad. im not really mad at her. I feel more sorry for her than anything else. right now I dont care if she vents to dh about things, it gives him a chance to see what her motives are. But if she starts doing these conversations while its cutting into me and his time then its on and he knows that stuff wont fly with me. Obviously her live in boyfriend (paramour haha) doesnt do it for her.
She was also saying that she wants full custody (when she was ACTUALLY talking about sd instead of her pain). Dh says no. there is no reason for her to, especially since he moved closer to sd. He atleast wants joint legal. She is also using sd for a paycheck which is obvious.
Does anybody know if him having joint physical would affect BM getting food stamps and Soc. Sec. Income for sd's 'adhd disability'?
i've been trying to find out but i havent yet. I know that is one reason why she wouldnt want dh to have joint physical if that is the case. Her child support would go down as well which i know she doesnt want.
blahhhh i cant wait to be with dh again!!
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Comments
Does it really matter to you
Does it really matter to you if she gets all that government assistance with joint custody. Isnt the most important thing to figure out if you'll be happy having the skid in your home & all the drama? Its good to look at why DH tells you all this stuff about what BM says,cuz what good does it do any of us stepmoms to hear all the venom BM spews out? I believe that most DH talk about the comparison to whip us into shape & have us outperform the BM in every way to benefit the DH. While we are at home cooking,cleaning & running around being a domestic goddess taking care of their children while they are sitting with their feet up!
"To thine own self be true"
i dont really care that she
i dont really care that she gets govt assistance. it matters to bm though and I was just asking to make sure it wouldnt affect her 'govt income' (one less thing she will try to fight about if dh having joint custody would affect her free $) and dh wasnt telling me to 'whip me into shape'. he already tells me all the time he's glad he got rid of her and that he has me instead so there is nothing i need to change about myself. and I love my sd and would love to have more time with her. Bm's hatred towards me doesnt affect me. She can be as bitter as she wants to, my life wont stop because of her.
I agree that some DHs do this
I agree that some DHs do this to "whip us into shape!" I'd say "keep it to yourself, otherwise I will call the BF and tell him about the conversations!".
As far as her getting help for her kid's "ADHD disability"? Her business, provided they don't later come back to your DH to repay the govt. At the same time I am disgusted w/people getting this type of help! Heck, my munchkin has ADHD, autism, OCD, blah, blah...and I have spent all of my savings helping him w/out ever requesting a DIME from the govt. I have seen many kids/parents who get so many "doctor prescribed therapies" who have not improved anywhere near as much as my son...it is unbelievable! They get this help to line their pockets and not take the time to change the way they deal w/their kids...that's too much work...and at the end, they do more damage to their kids just so that they can have a nicer lifestyle and people can feel sorry for them.
Yeah thats why i put 'adhd
Yeah thats why i put 'adhd disability' because I dont think sd's adhd is so bad for bm to even get $ for it! Its not disabling! She is on meds, but its only for concentration. Her behavior isnt affected or anything. I think, like you said, if she changed how she dealt with sd, sd would be alot better. She doesnt spend nearly as much time with her learning stuff as she should. Dh always does her learning stuff when she is here. Its quite obvious that she forgets it in between visits.
it has KINDA. but after dh's
it has KINDA. but after dh's convo with her yesterday, its apparent her bf doesnt do it like dh did i guess lol.