Late night calls/texts ... Grrrrr!
SD21 likes to call/text DH during the night. I've talked with him about this, because I wake up every time she does it. He said that he would tell her to stop doing it unless it's an emergency. Now, I don't know what he or she considers an emergency but it must be different from my definition because she keeps doing it. It's my opinion that if it's after 10 p.m., unless she's in the emergency room at the hospital, it can wait until morning. Well, she did it again tonight. We had just fallen asleep when I was awaken to the sound of his phone vibrating on the nightstand at 1130. I nudged him because it kept vibrating and he wasn't hearing it. He replied back to the text. I said "do I even have to ask who that was? Was it SD21?" His reply: yes. I knew it was her, because she's the only one rude enough to do this. Nobody ever calls or texts us that late. They know we have kids sleeping and that we're tired by that time ourselves. Does she care? Nope. Now I can't get back to sleep. GRRRRRR! I'm starting to think that she's doing this thinking that we may be in the throws of passion and she'd like to interrupt. Really, why else would she text that late? He uses the alarm on his phone for his a.m. wake up, but as of tomorrow, he will find a brand new alarm clock on his nightstand, and his phone will just have to sleep in the dining room until morning. I've had it with the rudeness. As if I don't already have enough issues with her, now she's rattling my brain during the night, too!
- stepoff's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
really not right..especially
really not right..especially as she is in age terms at least-an adult! You are quite right renew the alarm facility-if he kicks off explain gently that the bedroom is a space for your relationship-not a happy family threesome!
Here's another question...why
Here's another question...why is he even bothering to respond?
And his responding to her
And his responding to her only encourages more. If she won't stop, maybe he can tell your SD that she needs to call YOUR phone for emergencies because his will be OFF.
or just set his text notices
or just set his text notices to silent...
Hey, it seems like you are
Hey, it seems like you are easily awaken and he is not ( I nudged him because it kept vibrating and he wasn't hearing it) next time, you gently grab his phone and text her back saying:
"SD21, please don't text *insert DH's name here (do not insert "dad")* after 10 PM unless is an emergency, thank you."
what kind of phone does your
what kind of phone does your husband have? I also use my phone as an alarm clock but i turn my phone off at night. it automatically turns back on to whatever time i have my alarm set. i have a blackberry.
The only thing I can think of
The only thing I can think of is she 'needs' something again. That's really the only time she ever calls. Never calls just to say 'hi'. He didn't hear it because he uses a CPAP machine when he sleeps. So it buzzed and buzzed. GRRR. I have absolutely NO problem with him communicating with his daughter, but when it interrupts our lives, that's where I draw the line. There are normal waking hours to call a person. She had ALL DAY, why wait until 1130? I've told him in the past to ignore it. Don't answer the phone after 10 p.m. or during dinner. HUGE pet peeve of mine. He still does it. Well, it's just another issue to add to my LONG list of issues for our therapy session on Friday.
I solved my problem with SS
I solved my problem with SS texting late at night. I occasionally work midnights I started texting husband at night, husband got mad and said he's trying to sleep. I told him if he can stay up having SS texting him he can stay up with me, his wife, texting him, the SS texting late at night asking stupid questions stopped the next night I was home and not at work.
Oh Crayon, I have NO doubt
Oh Crayon, I have NO doubt about that. Either DH will 'buck-up' and put his foot down (or up her azz) or he won't. If he doesn't we'll be over pretty quickly. This is his chance to show where his loyalty lies. Now, I never ever would ask him to cut her out of her life, but he certainly DOES need to draw the line with her and let her know that the line will NOT be overstepped. It's time for her to put on her big girl panties and start showing us some respect. Period. I'm finished pussy-footing around and playing games with her. Those days are O-V-E-R.
I'm finished pussy-footing
I'm finished pussy-footing around and playing games with her. Those days are O-V-E-R.
________________
This is where I was with SS19 I refused to be used for money and maid service and I let husband know I married him not his adult children. I put up with SS and Husbands BS when SS was under age. I tried my hardest to get SS to act his age, heck I'm the one who insisted he have a car and I'm the one who paid for it, it was a used car but still both my kids were provided cars (they live in a rural area where there is no public trans) and got jobs to help pay for their own gas, insurance they didn't have to pay for if they were in school and SS crapped on that too. So I know husband came with baggage and kids but when the kid became an adult I refused to put up with it. His oldest son wasn't treated the same way youngest SS was. Husband luckily woke up and took the daddy googles off.
You really must nip this in
You really must nip this in the bud!
I had the SAME issue with all THREE of daddy's girls when they were in their 20s. (I'm with you DaB.....when I was 21 my "daddy" was the LAST person I'd be calling!! Sheeesh!!)
My SDs would call "daddy" at all hours for dumb reasons, too "Daddy, I can't find my car in the parking lot!!" was probably the most classic....
Then I NIP SH$T in the bud (my H and I were engaged at the time and he pretty much stayed at my house all the time)....I'm up for work and out the door at 6:30 AM. THEREFORE, and this was my rule LONG before he came into the picture, 9:00 IS THE CUT OFF. NO EXCEPTIONS unless it is a DIRE EMERGENCY.
Oh, they balked and whined, but I told H to feel free to go back to HIS HOME to entertain these calls. I wasn't doing it.
Maybe that's something you could do. (First of all, I'd BAN phone from the bedroom anyway. For YEARS we all survived not having cell phones, and how many emergencies did you "miss" without the cell phone?) If he insists on allowing these nuisance calls, I'd make him go sleep in another room. Bullcrap. Why should YOUR health/lack of sleep be taxed by this BRAT?
Keep us posted!! There is no excuse for those calls. None.
I don't get it?? Did I miss
I don't get it??
Did I miss something?
My SD 18 does this, after
My SD 18 does this, after repeatedly being told not to. She doesn't leave for college until August. But she'll text on her way home from work- "Leaving" "In T-Town" "At gas station. Home in 10 mins."
Geez- we know what time you get off work! Just tap on the bedroom door when you get home!
I'm going to use some of these tips for myself! thanks, gang!
She shouldn't text if it's
She shouldn't text if it's her normal time to get off work, if she's gonna be late I don't see anything wrong with texting that but she should text it when she finds out not late at the last minute. We had an issue with SS being told to text before 11 if he's not working and going to be out late, we wanted to just know he's ok. He either failed to text before 11PM or he'd text at 2am. He has no concept of common courtesy