SD does this in a way. She's always saying, My mommy has this or my mommy has that. She is always talking about her mom... It drives me crazy!

****"She had his past. I have his future." The Lovely Belleboudeuse****

You know, I think the best way to deal with this is to not care. You KNOW he married her, You KNOW he has a past with her, You KNOW he had a kid with her.............none of this is a surprise to you. Just try to ignore it. I know it sucks to hear about it all the time, but she's a child and children think of things like this.

I know how and where my mom and dad were married. I don't remember them ever being together......my father left when I was just born. But my mom told me. I think it's natural to think of your parents together and wish for it to be that way.

I'm super happy that you don't say these things to her, it would be very bad if you did I think!!

On your side of it all...........I understand why it's upsetting. You don't want to always hear about mommy and daddy getting married. It's exhausting. It's sickning.

But, you know it was. So just try to ignore sweetie. It's normal, natural, and will happen no matter what I'm afraid.

I really think the bigger problem here is that you let it get to you. Does it get to you to the point that you come here and blog, or that you act differently in your everyday life? If it's blog and blog only then kudos to you!!!

or...reverse funny...when SD is the daughter of a complete liar...

we were doing geography homework tonight and got to Nevada...BF says "you can remember Nevada because Mommy married SF in Las Vegas." SD "no she didn't" ME; yes hony, they got married in Vegas SD: no, mommy said in the south BF: SD, no they were married in Vegas. Let's move on.

Yeah... I know what you mean. Olderson always tells these tails that his mom tells him about dh. Like his dad has these kind of shoes, or that his dad did this. No kid, your dad doesn't have those dhoes anymore, he got rid of them. And how would she know, they are now divorced!!!
The things is that dh never talks about BM to the kids, but bm apparently talk about dh. He does talk about snowflake alot though. SNowflake does this, and snowflake and dh do that. He wants to creat a family with snowflake, dh, biobaby, and steps. She is not a part of the picture, so they should get used to that!

They were divorced before you can even remember them being together kid. My goodness!!!

i guess i can be grateful that sd doesnt do this too much. its nice that she hardly mentions her mom at all, except when we go to drop her off she keeps saying 'mommy's house' or so variant of that. She is 6 though. and if we had her more than EOWE, it might be more of mommy this or that.

ss5 has started doing this....its annoying because you know they dont remember...i think they need to justify that they came in to this world from a loving situation.

imagine being that little, with all the tension and drama that we all go through, thinking that the two people that created you never loved each other, you were a mistake, and daddy doesn't like mommy

I can top this... One day I decided to visit a new church. The whole time, I'm sitting there thinking, I've been here before, why do I know this place?

I realize it's the church where DH married BM. Crazy woman had Princess scrapbook old wedding photos a few weeks before that, and Princess wanted me to see her new scrapbook. She was like 7 or 8. Now why the crazy woman was giving her kid pictures of her dad and her on their wedding day, I have no idea...

"I HAD to pick the road less traveled..."

Oh c'mon you guys. It's SOOOOOOO normal for a kid to do this. Really, I think you're putting to much into it.

It's aggervating as the second wife, but it's heart breaking for the child.

I agree BMJen- it's not an easy thing for stepparents or stepkids. Every time SDs did something like that, I'd think back to when I was their age, and how I'd see the church where Mom & Dad got married, and feel really hurt. I'd put a facade on my hurt by telling people this is where Mom & Dad got married. When I heard it from the SDs, I was aggravated, but I think they were doing the exact same thing that I did when I was their age and I was forced to contend with similar circumstances. So it's hard on both stepparents and their stepkids.

I agree that it's totally normal for a kid. I think they like to say stuff because it's an affirmation to them that they were created by a mom and a dad that were once together, no matter how briefly. My SDs still sometimes say things about their mom and dad together and that's ok because they WERE together once. Kids always always always have the dream of their parents being back together no matter how bad or how good their lives are or were.

deleted

Oh yes, I get this from SD11, only she talks about FH & BM's first date and where it was. It turns my stomach when its always brought up. Believe me she knows what she's saying, she always watched me for a response, I never give one. And it always starts with "Momma said....."

The mum only says it to the kid to make sure it is burned into the brain that she was there first, and by doing that she knows that you are going to hear it too. She is a selfish insecure bitch and the fact that she does talk about it means that she is pissed off that he has moved on with you. Trust me she is more furious than you are, why else would she drag things on and tell her kid that shit? Take solace in the fact that you have the upper hand and ignore the comments the kid is brainwashed with. All step mums cop that and its because the first mums know that they are not wanted!!

I get a similar version -- skids ask DH to tell them in graphic detail about trips they took with BM, or about what it was like in the hospital with BM when second skid was born, etc. I've asked him to wait until I'm out of earshot for the "detailed" versions, and he has gotten better...