All I have to say is WTF?

We had P/T conferences on Monday, which actually went well. Whatshername was civil and seemingly medicated.

Tuesday, the meds apparently wore off and the crazy started back up. On our weekends, we take the boys to church and they go to Sunday school. Part of Sunday school is a choir and the choir sings at some of the Sunday services. We got the list of upcoming performances, and a couple of them fall on her weekends. So, FDH sends her an email with the dates and asks if the boys can go. He told the boys that it was up to her on her weekends and he would ask her. He gives her the option of taking them herself or we pick them up Sunday morning, take them to Sunday school/church and then bring them back. Again, asking her since it's her weekend. Well, she has a fit and sends an incredibly nasty email that we never even told her we were signing the boys up for Sunday school and that we shouldn't be putting them in things on her weekends and can't keep "borrowing them" during her time.

Now, she has a "policy" that what she does with the boys when they are with her is her business and she doesn't have to tell us anything. Therefore, there was no reason to tell her about Sunday school since we did it on our weekends. Sunday school is every weekend, but they only go every other weekend. We have no control over the choir performance dates and told the boys that there might be some that they won't be able to go to. I still don't see what the problem is with asking since it's something they like to do, at least that way there is at least the possibility.

Also, FDH has been asking about Mother's Day/Father's Day. We have them for Mother's Day and she has them for Father's Day, but the court order says that the kids should be with the appropriate parent for those two days. Well, she doesn't know what her schedule will be (she doesn't work, so not sure how hard it is to figure out your schedule). Doesn't matter. If she doesn't want them for Mother's Day, that's fine, but FDH is entitled to have them for Father's Day and wants them. Her deciding not to exercise her right to have them doesn't preclude him from exercising his right. Of course the court order is vague as to times, so he sent her an email asking about times. And then another, and one more since she can never seem to answer an entire question. At this point, she thinks it is too much "in person" switching of the children and hasn't really even said that she was willing to let him have the boys at all for Father's Day.

So, he sends another email - again asking about Father's Day and two other dates.

Memorial Day weekend, we are taking the boys out of town. It is our weekend. They have a half day of school on Friday and we want to pick them up there so we can start the drive. Again, the court order is vague as to when the weekend actually starts.

We're getting married August 25. It's her weekend (yeah, I know - with out of town family schedules we didn't have many options). So, he asks if we can have the boys for the wedding. Since he's guessing she doesn't know her schedule yet, he says just let me know if I can have them for the wedding and we can figure out the details of days you'd like to have in exchange as we get closer to the date.

Since she routinely doesn't respond to emails, he says "let me know if you have issues with these dates. If we can't reach an agreement on this, we will need to go to mediation. Please respond by Monday" (giving her 5 days).

So, this morning, FDH gets an email that was apparently not meant for him. Genius sent an email to her attorney whining "but this is the first I heard of this. Can he do this?" (meaning request mediation) The Father's Day thing has been over multiple emails, you've chosen not to answer it. Since you can't answer half of your emails, he's asking once, giving you a deadline to respond and then if there is no response or we can't reach an agreement he will go a different direction. The email clearly stated "let me know if you have any issues" and "IF we can't reach an agreement" then mediation will be requested. So, answer the damn emails, try to compromise and save everyone the cost and frustration of mediation.

Seriously, wtf? How can this stuff be so hard to understand? You don't respond to emails, but then get pissed when you're only told once about something? Why should we be required to ask the same question 4 or 5 times before (maybe) getting a (partial) answer?

Oh, and he's the one who's "disrespectful and rude." She who can't manage to send the boys over with everything they need and then gets pissed when we ask for their library books, who says "yep, they're in the bag" when asked about SS5's sneakers, only for me to open the bag when FDH gets home to see 1(!) sneaker instead of the pair. Who sends them back without things we send over like snowpants without saying a word and when asked, "oh, they must have been left at school" without bothering to send hers over. She who, when he went to pick the boys up at her apartment said (in front of the children) I don't want you in here and then followed up with an email that in the future he is to wait in the car and she'll send the children out.

I really try to be civil and polite, but she's a lazy, evil, crazy bitch who does nothing but complain about what we do, refuses to attempt to co-parent at all and thinks that if she says "I'm not discussing this anymore" than she's right by virtue of having the last word. So, if I say the earth is flat and I'm not going to discuss it anymore, that makes it so?