Anxious and feeling resentful
I am 33 yr old bm of 1 boy, just turned 5, my dh and I have been married 3 yrs in september. He has a daughter, 12, whom lives with us.
My blogs before were to try and get an idea on how to deal with the sd attitude, not doing what she is asked, always wanting something etc. She has been at her bm's for 3 weeks and I dont miss her at all. I know if it was my son I would be missing him terribly.
I need advice, my dh asked me when wewere going to make plans to visit her. I dont want to. I honestly feel that she could just stay there and not come back and I would be fine with that. But, then the responsible side of me says, thats not right, she is a child who needs guidance etc, and her dad loves her and misses her. (not sure how true that missing her part is).
How do I go on without just starting the cycle of hatred again. I really need advice..........PLEASE someone help me. I am not a bad person, love kids as I did daycare for a while, but the last 1 1/2 yrs with this kid have been hell on me, my patients, my blood pressure. And if I admit I dont want her in my home to my husband in sure it will not be positive at all.....
Please help, feel trapped in my own self....
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Comments
I don't know that I have a
I don't know that I have a lot of advice to give you. I am in the same situation as you, and it's nice to know that other people feel the same! I just try to remind myself that this is only a child, and he needs his father, and his dad needs him too.
Good luck to you!
No one says you have to miss
No one says you have to miss her or feel about her how you feel about your bs. Can your husband not go visit her by himself?
I wish there was an easy
I wish there was an easy answer but there isn't. If you admit to your husband that you don't want his daughter in your house chances are he will be upset and feel torn between the two of you. I don't miss my SD when she is gone either. Currently we are on a 4 day rotation and when she was on vacation for 2 weeks it wasn't long enough.
I just try to be as positive as I can and always look forward to those days she is with BM. I think feeling resentful is pretty normal. You always think about what life could be like without the skid..but that life won't ever exist. Sometimes I find myself wishing my DH wasn't such an involved Father but then at the same time it is good to know that he will be that kind of Father when we have children of our own. Always tough. Good luck!!