So I'm having to practice what I preach today. Indifference. Detached. I don't give a flying f**k. (Big Sigh).

25 yo SS came over last night, unannounced, following a phone call with his dad (my DH). SS walked in, didn't knock, just walked in and demanded to have the laptop DH told him we would give him. During the phone call DH insisted the harddrive be removed, at our house, to ensure our privacy wasn't jeopardized with anything that the SS could get off the harddrive. SS doesn't know how to do this, but came over anyway and would have his cousin "walk him through it" over the phone, while at our house. Again, during the phone call, DH said it would have to wait until SS's cousin could come over and do it. DH was very direct to SS that it would have to wait.

DH and I had just gotten home from a long drive and running errands. We didn't want company and we didn't want to mess with the laptop issue. But as usual, now that SS knows where we live, he just makes his needs first and foremost, regardless of the boundaries he steps over.

DH and I are just flabergasted that SS comes over and DH tells him to leave. SS doesn't. I ask the SS why this laptop issue is so urgent that he has to disrespect our boundaries and that once again he's making his issues our issues.

SS starts cussing and screaming, walks over to DH, gets right in his face (seriously, I didn't know if he was going to bite him or hit him) and starts screaming at the top of his lungs. I tell him to leave and that I'm calling the police. Just as I do this, SS dials 911 and states that he's being hit and kicked and abused by his father and step-mom. At this point, SS is outside and yes, I have placed my hand on his chest, pushing him out of the house and out of the driveway. My DH is physically unable to protect himself from a series of medical complications. I feel like it's my responsibility to protect him from any physical harm that could occur with SS. (mind you, not 3 days ago, SS stated he would get a gun and kill his brother b/c brother wouldn't give him money to get an apartment. I told the police this.)

The police show up, get both sides of the story and ensure us that the report would be written in a way that details how the SS was wrong. They also asked about trespassing and explained if we wanted they would notify the SS that if he comes back, he would be arrested for trespassing. DH agrees to that plan.

(Big Sigh)...so here I am the next morning, rumminating about the whole scene last night. DH is just sick about how SS is and that he knows where we live, but mostly he's sad that his son is like this. I so want to just yell to my DH at the top of my lungs at how much I hate this kid but I can't. So, I guess I'm doing it here, b/c I know you guys will help me self-talk through this. You also can tell me how dumb we are for inviting SS for Thanksgiving, letting him know where we live and thinking that things would be different.