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Visitation Schedule

overworkedmom's picture

Submitted by overworkedmom on Thu, 05/23/2013 - 11:53am

I am just wondering if the schedule below sounds standard or not. Input would be greatly appreciated!!

• Children spend EOWE with father. Children will go from Fri at 6 pm until Sun at 6 pm.
o If father has military drill that weekend then it is up to him to find child care. Mother has the right of first refusal for childcare those weekends.

• EO Spring Break with each parent (father odd years/ mother even years)

• Easter weekend with mother
• Mothers day/ Fathers day weekends spent with proper parents

• Summer father will have 2 full weeks, divided into separate weeks.

• EO Thanksgiving break with each parent (Father odd years/ Mother even years)

• Christmas break divided into 2- Mother has first half until Dec. 26 at 9 am father has until Jan 1 at 6 pm. (Mother Christian/ Father Jewish)

• Father agrees to take children to extracurricular activities including but not limited to: Dance, Cheer, Football, Baseball, Swimming, Cub scouts, etc. on his weekends.

**** Make up weekends—The weekend following the missed/disrupted weekend will be divided into 2 parts (fri night and sat night). Father will have 2nd half of weekend and able to pick up children at 6 pm Sat. and return them 6 pm Sun. The schedule will go back to normal the next weekend.

Comments

Kilgore SMom's picture

Submitted by Kilgore SMom on Thu, 05/23/2013 - 12:06pm

That is standard. Except they usally get one day durning the week and a month during the summer depending on the age of the child.

Totalybogus's picture

Submitted by Totalybogus on Thu, 05/23/2013 - 12:08pm

• Father agrees to take children to extracurricular activities including but not limited to: Dance, Cheer, Football, Baseball, Swimming, Cub scouts, etc. on his weekends

I don't like this one. I think it will cause problems moving forward. In essence, the mother can sign them up for anything she wants and dad HAS to taxi them during his weekends to those extra-curriculars which may sometimes if not most times impede his visitation with the kids. She basically can dictate his weekends based on whatever she signs them up for.

overworkedmom's picture

Submitted by overworkedmom on Thu, 05/23/2013 - 12:36pm

This has to be stipulated because of problems in the past. The kids are in an activity year round and this is something that is important for the children to stay active. He should look at the opportunities to bond with the kids.

Shaman29's picture

Submitted by Shaman29 on Thu, 05/23/2013 - 12:19pm

Is the father practicing his religion? If so, then he may want to make arrangements for Jewish holidays (Passover, Rosh Hashanah , Hanukkah). Additionally, the caveat about his drill weekends should be replaced with arrangements to switch weekends with BM on his drill weekends. She doesn't have the right to dictate this and it can be written into the CO that they switch weekends on his drill weekends. Or that the kids stay with BM on his drill weekends and he gets a makeup weekend.

overworkedmom's picture

Submitted by overworkedmom on Thu, 05/23/2013 - 12:35pm

Yes with the religion, but we have found that mixing religions is too confusing for children. They can have an understanding of both but need to be assured that they are Christian. This has been a problem and a Rabbi actually told us when we had children that they need to be raised Christian. My ex stood up with me when they are Baptized and signed the certificate.

And every other working parent that has to pull a weekend shift would have to arrange child care as well. I do, if I have to work because I got behind during the week then I would have to arrange care. Drill is not overnight he has to work 8-4 sat and 9-3 sun.

Shaman29's picture

Submitted by Shaman29 on Thu, 05/23/2013 - 12:42pm

If my DH was in the military and required to take drills, he would probably have a caveat in the CO for those particular weekends. They are required and not something he can rearrange.

overworkedmom's picture

Submitted by overworkedmom on Thu, 05/23/2013 - 12:52pm

it's one weekend a month and he actually can do "make up" drill if he needs to. It is not something that would effect the visitation often. Drill is something he plays up a lot

overworkedmom's picture

Submitted by overworkedmom on Thu, 05/23/2013 - 12:31pm

They are still pretty young and due to work schedules/ daycare this is what he can afford to take off.

Shaman29's picture

Submitted by Shaman29 on Thu, 05/23/2013 - 12:39pm

Gotcha.

DH asked me to help him with his visitation schedule because Uberskank was trying to hose him on time. He did the schedule based on suggestions from a custody evaluator.

Starting at the beginning of the year....

EO spring break
Father's Day weekend (likewise MD weekend is spent with Uberskank)
Memorial Day weekend (Labor Day weekend is with Uberskank)
EO 4th of July
EO Thanksgiving
Winterbreak - Friday she gets out of school until 7pm on Christmas Eve

6 weeks in the summer, not consecutive weeks.

overworkedmom's picture

Submitted by overworkedmom on Thu, 05/23/2013 - 12:44pm

This is actually for me. My ex is taking me back to court 1 week after I have to go with DH and the incubator. I am just at a loss. Our old order give him so much more time and i have been super flexible in the past. BUT all of that was done while the kids were not in school or having any activities yet. The current schedule is putting so much stress on me and my DH having to cater to him, so by him deciding to take me back to court I want to revert to a more standard schedule. I swear that the ex taking me back to court is turning me in crazy BM!

overworkedmom's picture

Submitted by overworkedmom on Thu, 05/23/2013 - 12:48pm

The right of refusal just is keeping him from dumping kids with whatever current girlfriend he has. They can come home while he goes to work and then pick them up when he is done at work.

Mandatory activities is common and the judge ordered it before- they are only in one thing at a time and he needs to take them to games/ recitals if he has them that weekend. They are on a team and the team counts on them to be there

Splitting winter break is what is done with us because of religious differences

Once the kids get a little older they can go for longer periods but they are young now. Also, this allows him to actually take them places and get off work during the full weeks