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Can't stand when people get things they don't deserve....

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Submitted by NewSM10 on Fri, 04/02/2010 - 8:41pm

like when BM posts on her facebook that her life is so wonderful. She finally got a job, her husband took her back and now accepted a better job offer, life is just so great for them. Oh, the world should be happy that someone as spiteful and evil gets her way yet again. Why do people who don't deserve anything get blessings in life? I know life isn't fair but damn it, it isn't in the least. Do you think our life got any better once we decided to try and do the right thing and be civil w/BM so we can be part of SS9's life.

I'm thinking of sending this msg to BM regarding my last blog........

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Submitted by NewSM10 on Sun, 03/28/2010 - 12:36pm

I am thinking of sending this to BM regarding my last blog. I want to come across sympathetic to her so that maybe she will be willing to communicate with me about it. I also want to make it clear to her that FH is done trying to be civil with her. If ya'll can think of anything to add or make it less harsh, let me know. I know that it won't be a positive reaction from her but she can't go on thinking it is okay for her to open her mouth and cause drama without any consequences for her actions.

decided to take a few steps back in all of this

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Submitted by NewSM10 on Sun, 03/21/2010 - 11:07am

It really did take BM's drunken confessions to make me realize what I have been dealing with all along. BM still has a huge obvious crush on FH and admitted that she did try to trap FH in the past by keeping SS9. I no longer feel sympathy or the need to come in and "fix" things and make it all better b/c it was her own selfishness that has caused her child to be in this mess. I no longer care! Is that wrong of me? I really don't care at this point if I see SS9, nor do I feel like taking time out of my life and causing myself stress to fix her problems.

Some days are good, others are not so good

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Submitted by NewSM10 on Tue, 03/16/2010 - 6:22pm

I really feel that the life of a step mom is depressing. Some days I really have a hard time coping with things. FH and I wanted to start trying for a baby and we did, but are still not successful. I just don't understand, FH had a one night stand at age 17 and produced a child, now that he is almost 30 and wants a child with his future wife.....no luck! We suffered a miscarriage a year and a half ago, why is life so unfair! It makes it almost unbearable to deal with having a step child that I really do not want in my life. I really feel like an evil person and I'm really not.

still waiting to hear back from BM about next visitation

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Submitted by NewSM10 on Mon, 03/01/2010 - 7:46pm

It's been over a week now and I still haven't heard back from BM about our next visitation date. We are suppose to see SS9 every other weekend and right now 2 weeks feels like too long of a gap without seeing SS as it is. It is also his bday tomorrow, we sent a card in the mail, and we did decline to go to bday party with her fam this weekend. However, we should still get our visitation with SS! BM's facebook says that SS is due to go to BM's Dad's the following weekend.....so what the heck?

how many more supervised visits do we have to have???????? We are his parents too!

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Submitted by NewSM10 on Sun, 02/21/2010 - 9:42am

Okay, so this was the second visit with SS soon to be 9, with both sets of parents. We had already met the other parents once before that for a total of 3 times. SS9 has already expressed that he wants to go to our house and spend the night with us. He has adjusted extremely well and is already attached to us. He says he doesn't want us to ever leave him! So sweet! Anyway, BM is now scheduling another group visit, or might I say supervised visit with them. How many more supervised visits are necessary?????? I mean, it is hard enough for FH to be civil and be in the same room with BM.

trying to establish boundaries while playing nice with BM and her husband

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Submitted by NewSM10 on Tue, 02/16/2010 - 6:37pm

So, this Friday will be the second meeting with SS8, BM and her husband. We are now establishing visitation with child after 8 years. Long story short it was a one night stand and BM was psycho in the past and is now a changed women (in her own words) so we are in communication with her and child now. Anyway, BM has stated to me that she would like FH and I to attend SS8 birthday party with her family in a few weeks and in the future. FH and I do not want to have interaction with her family nor does FH or I want her to have anything to do with his.

TRYING TO DEAL WITH BEING A NEW SM

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Submitted by NewSM10 on Sun, 02/14/2010 - 9:59am

First of all, I am so happy I found this site. I was seriously about to lose my mind. I don't know how anyone copes with having a blended family, it is so common these days. Anyway, I feel so relieved after reading an old post from 2006 about resentment towards a step child. I typed "how to deal with resentment towards step child" on google and found this site and the post. I no longer feel like what I am feeling is off the wall or out of the ordinary. It is actually the opposite and normal! My situation is a little different considering my stepson was a result of a one night stand.