So this weekend was the "Gran weekend". This happens every other weekend. SS5 packs an overnight bag, and spends Friday night and all of Saturday at Gran's house. Gran is the mother of BM. BM is never around, so Gran tries to make up for that by having zero rules, 100% fast food at request. The woman goes so far as to flush the toilet behind him. It seems like every time he comes back, there is a complete emotional breakdown on his end. To be honest, what kid would want to leave a place where they get everything they want, when and how they want it, to a place where there are rules and chores and structure? It's so irritating, and it seems like no matter how much DH talks to them, they don't respect our rules. I feel like the irritations are valid, but maybe I'm wrong;

Bedtime is 8 o'clock (because it takes SS5 an hour to calm down enough to go to sleep), yet they consistently bring him home late.
We pack him a full night and day worth of clothes, plus extra socks and underwear. They return him in the same clothes.
He is not bathed while he is there (this includes after berry picking, park playing, hiking/camping, skiing, etc).
They feed him whatever he asks for, including making/buying him something else if he decides he doesn't want it after he gets it.
They don't correct any behavior (so he rules the house while he's there).

The list goes on and on. It's frustrating because it's one of those things that I can't control. I can put up with a lot, but when you take a child with eczema to go berry picking, then let him sleep in those dirt covered clothes and play at the park the next day in those same sweat/dirt covered clothes...things don't go so well. I'm so tired of him coming home with a bag of the same clean clothes that he packed before he left, and skin that is cracked and bleeding. Then once he gets here, I have to deal with the emotional breakdown because he's dropped off half an hour after bedtime, and has fallen asleep in their car. Ever woken a kid up after they've been asleep for 15 minutes during bedtime? I'm 27 and get cranky if I'm woken up right after falling asleep. Then I have to bathe him (45 minutes to an hour after he's supposed to be in bed) and try to get him to sleep at a decent time so everyone else can stay on schedule? UUUUGH. I'm at that point where I really don't care how well DH gets along with his ex in-laws, I don;t think I should have to deal with them or the aftermath of him going to see them.

Ok, rant over I think.