Start parenting your kid consistently!!! Rant
Our work has picked up since the pandemic. DH and I own a business and majority of it is exterior. Therefore we work long hours together and or separately. Given that he still has SS9 every other day and every other weekend. I've gotten to the point that I have taken back my authority in my home and with that being said SS9 no longer has this adult status, as he seemed to think he had before! Sooooo, anytime SS9 makes a mess, leaves his clothes anywhere, can't pick up after himself, and or etc.... guess who hears it? That's right DH. I'm beyond done talking to a spoiled and enabled child. I make his father parent him, as he should!
Last night, I woke up DH, said "pls tell your son TO GO TO BED!!! It almost 4am. I can hear he is up and still on his phone, because his volume is blasting loud!" DH, yelled across the room to living room (SS wanted to sleep on the couch). SS can't seem to hear for shit, so I reiterated "GET UP AND TELL HIM! TF ITS ALMOST 4am WE GOT TO WORK TOMORROW!!!" DH huffs and puffs and as sweet as possible relays that he has to go to bed. I'm like why do you tip toe around him. I know you don't care about what time he stays up and etc. you don't have to care for him tomorrow- my daughter does! It ain't fair that he can disrupt my sleep and I got to work! DH didn't even say a word, except that "I'm tired and I don't want to deal with this right now." I left it alone.
This morning- I get up and do my routine before I leave for work: let's dogs out, make coffee, wash up and get dress. Why the hell did SS wake up whining to DH "it's so loud I'm so tired!" Lost my shit, I responded instead of letting DH because I'm still floor how this little human spawn had the nerve to whine about how noisy it was, yet he was on his phone all night and I couldn't even get a decent night sleep! So I said "Well, maybe if you slept in your bed, in your room, you wouldn't hear any noise I MAKE. Also, you didn't seem to care about anyone but yourself while blasting your phone watching YouTube all night! You want to learn to respect the adults in this house before you make complaints!" DH was definitely not happy at my response, and at this point in my life I didn't give a shit. I'm done tip toeing around a fucking child in my house who lacks respect! I yelled at DH start parenting him! If he wasn't up late as fuck with his face glued to a phone all night he wouldn't be whining, furthermore how about telling him to sleep in his own room! I don't feel his whining and complaints are even remotely considerable since he is child and does absolutely nothing all day but stay glued to his phone or PS4!" I left and went to work I didn't even care what DH Had to say.
SS is also to get picked up by his BM today, but she pick him up after she gets out of work. DH is lucky my daughter is home to watch him, because I could have told him to take his spawn with him, but I was nice to not say anything. My daughter did keep me in the loop by relaying that SS9 didn't wake up until 2:30pm and then he was on his phone since he woke up and then didn't even pick up the mess in the living room and on the couch (couch has lots of pillows and two throw blankets SS seem to have used every part of the huge couch has his full out bed) but he was picked up at 5 and left the mess there. told my BD16 to leave it there I'll make DH pick up after his son. She obliged, she was upset because she had e-learning to do and also was tending to the dogs in between. Don't even think this child bothers with school because both DH and BM seem to not care anymore whether he gets on a computer to learn or to even parent him to do schooling. Whatever not my problem anymore.
DH and I get home at the same time. Walk into the house and he was like what up with the mess on the couch?! I told him- it's your son, he doesn't ever pick up after himself and I don't think my daughter should pick up after him since he's capable of doing it himself, so now that your home you can pick up after him. If you got a problem with that then you take it up with your kid! We are done being a maids, chefs, pick up crew for your spoiled child! You need to parent him and consistently do it, until you are tired of hearing me get on you for him or to be on him about being responsible for minor things. Then you take it up with him. It's called parenting a young boy and being on top of him.
DH didn't like my attitude, he fixes the mess and heads to the garage. He is currently there now and honestly I am done being sweet and nice because he lacks parenting his young enabled and spoiled child!
We shall see what the weekend brings because it's SS visitation weekend, this weekend. He has also been given the opportunity to take his visitation to his mothers for the weekend if he doesn't want to be here, but he refuses. So I informed him that when SS is here there are rules and he needs to learn how to pick up after himself. If you don't want him doing anything he can take him and go to his mothers house so he can be spoiled.
As the saga continues... lol
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You go girl!!!
Excellent. Good for you!!
Don’t let your DH turn you into the
Maid. He doesn't want to parent SS. He can clean up, cook ect. Think who more of a child, SS or DH
Kudos to you for laying it out there to your husband/partner
Its typical for them to claim they’re tired and blah blah blah. I remember when my son was 3 months old that ss19 was downstairs screaming like crazy and ran up to the staircase to out upstairs bedroom huffing and puffing.
hubby had heard screaming and is like what the eff isgoing on. Ss claimed demons were in his room trying to possess him. Absolute crap!! Its just the after effects of locking yourself to the world and addicted to computer games...
whenever my husband claimed ss had imaginary stress syndrome at being told to clean his mess and stop dumping trash on kitchen floor because he didn’t want to empty the bin. What idiot leaves skewer sticks on the floor knowing he has 2 toddlers crawling around the house? A self centred prick.
i told hubby to grow the eff up, man up and parent his kid because if one of my kids gets injured by ss intentionally leaving skewer sticks on the floor, i’ll jam those skewer sticks up his peehole and he’ll cry like a little biatch...
it was then hubby realised how selfish his kid was. But any issues, I don’t care if hubby is in an important meeting, he gets a message of what happened and told to deal with it
You're looking mighty good in
You're looking mighty good in those sleek black bi!ch boots, girl.
Good job redirecting the parenting to the Dad. And I hope you're not expecting your daughter to babysit the skid too often? Send him to work with your H as much as possible. After all, it's his parenting time.
I'm impressed! You need to
I'm impressed! You need to start teaching courses here on StepTalk! Too many women here tiptoeing around their spouses like they are made out of porcelain.
I second sending a tired, crabby, rotten SS to work with DH. Pay your DD NOT to babysit him, if she enjoys doing it for the money.
What kind of father doesn't care if his kid is up until 4 am at age 9??
(No subject)
I love every bit of this post
I love every bit of this post!!! You go!!!
You don't have to tolerate a
You don't have to tolerate a skid this age being up all night. Take away the phone, the tv, whatever, at bedtime.
tbh i wouldnt allow my own
tbh i wouldnt allow my own child to babysit if she had her own work, as am sure it must also be frustrating and a bit stressful for her also. jimpo
Oh I agree
Just so happened it was only for a short time before I got home. I stopped that a lot along time ago, cause he just assumed that my daughter would since she is home. My daughter does not care for his SS, she said he makes messes and doesn't do anything all day but try to sneek food downstairs and he's very bossy when he talks "I'm hungry make me something ". So I told DH that my daughter is not his babysitter nor has he ever thanked her for watching him and caring for him when we work. He just assumes it's ok.
So now I purposely have my daughter stay by my mothers the days SS9 is here so she doesn't have to watch him and DH has to figure out how to parent or find someone to watch him. Even on our weekends with SS. She stays with my mother because she doesn't want to get stuck watching him when we work.
DH asked how come she goes and doesn't stay? I told him because she likes being with her grandmother and also, she's not responsible for your son while we work. He's not nice and he doesn't clean up and she's not a maid. Also, told him that he doesn't even ask her to watch him nor even thanks her for caring for SS! He was appalled that I told him and yet thankfully he apologized because she's right. Although he says SS doesn't require a lot to care for, I told him he's a 9 year old, he's not a adult who takes care of himself or can stay by himself! So yes he requires a lot, he still needs to eat and still needs to be watched so he isn't acting like a slob around the house. So, regardless if he feels that "he doesn't require a lot!" I told him then take him with you to work.
So he does now and finds it hard because no one wants to watch him because everyone is busy and or doesn't want to deal with him. I told DH DOESNT he see a pattern, your son is obviously a handful and no one is willing to help. Not even grandma. He doesn't see shit his son is a prince in his eyes. But at least my daughter isn't inconvenienced anymore and neither am I. I tell him to take him when I'm home, because he does nothing all day and when I ask him to do anything he huffs and puffs and I don't have time for that he can deal with him. It's his son not mine and before I was willing and kind enough to have him stay with me. I just am simply tired of dealing with the arrogance and entitlement of this child and SS knows I don't put up with him like everyone else, so he likes to be around people who enable him.