"Ever since you joined that step site..."
I've been a reader here for a few months, but not a big poster. This is my first blog.
fDH and I got in a pretty big fight a couple weeks ago because I felt like he didn't step in when SD15 was being rude to me. Long story short, this website has helped me learn to stick up for myself when it comes to my boundaries regarding Skids, and I am beginning to disengage.
In the argument, fDH says, "Ever since you joined that step site, you've been indifferent to Skids, and you're not trying anymore!"
I looked at him, and just laughed. Exactly! Indifferent is exactly what I am. Please step up and parent your two kids. It is not my job. Thanks.
Just got a kick out of it and thought you guys would too.
Just wanted to say thanks for all the help (indirectly)! Apparently, it's working. 
- Lauren B's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
That's awesome! And yeah,
That's awesome! And yeah, men need to place the blame on something other than the fact that their precious kids aren't the ones to blame!
Exactly! Oh, I should also
Exactly!
Oh, I should also mention, now if I'm the computer and he asks me what I'm doing, instead of the normal "Oh nothing, really," it's now "Oh, I'm on StepTalk."
I know it gets him every time.
Funny! You go girl! One of
Funny! You go girl! One of these days, he'll get it!
I think you are lucky you
I think you are lucky you learned to disengage BEFORE you got married!
Good for you my dear. Keep up the good work and save your sanity.
Thank you! StepTalk has me
Thank you! StepTalk has me now considering not marrying until SD15 is out of the house, as fDH has 50/50 custody. SS13 has been fine for the most part.
I didn't even know anything
I didn't even know anything about disengaging or how to set bounderies or anything about step parenting until I found this site. When I first met dh I was changing and washing ss's sheets (he was still wetting bed at age 12), cooking every meal and making ss lunches, cleaning, doing all his laundry, cleaning his room, etc. After finding this site I realized this little human being, ss, was not my kid, not my problem (now I just make sure his bedroom door is tightly shut at all times). Yes, at first dh hated me being on this site but now he's ok with me disengaging. He even tells his son to give me space sometimes, especially when I am cooking, so that I don't go on here and blab? lol I blab anyhow but not as badly as it could be!
I actually just had my DH
I actually just had my DH paint my BS24s room so that SS20 could move in there. BS24s room is downstairs at the back of the house and I won't have to see or smell my SS20's mess anymore. I will now turn SS20s room into a beautiful guest room where SD12 can sleep when she comes over. She thought I was going to turn it into a pink haven for her and I said "Sorry kid, this room is a guest room." I'm sure her Dad would love nothing more than to turn it into a fluffy, pink, princess palace, but NOPE. I too have learned to just deal with the Skids. I don't mistreat them, but I no longer do all the things I used to do for them. I have learned to take a step back. For my own sanity.
Waaah! You've changed, you
Waaah! You've changed, you aren't trying as hard! How can we abuse you when you don't play along? Damn right skippy. You can't use and abuse us like you are used to doing! I love disengaging. It soothes my wounded soul.
From the voice of experience,
From the voice of experience, I bent over backwards for my skids. They were never openly rude or a pain in the ass that some of the skids are on this site, but it is not like I got any "Thank you, misSTEP" or anything from it.
All we got is a psycho BM who brainwashed her kids into thinking their lives are better off without their dad (and his "new" woman) in it.
I am so jealous of these
I am so jealous of these lucky people who have BM's that WANT TO KEEP THEIR KIDS AWAY. I would send flowers and gifts if that happened.
Oh, my DH tried that shit on
Oh, my DH tried that shit on me too. He thinks I should spend less time on it or not at all. Here's my philosophy on it....
DH, maybe if you...
Parented your kids and be consistent in doing so.
Taught your kids to be respectful of me.
Stood up to the X who has your balls wrapped up in iron chains
There would be no need for a website like this...DUH :?
Oh, man! My husband knows
Oh, man! My husband knows that this site probably saved our marriage! It gave me a place to vent, and helped me stick to my guns. I still would never show him ANYTHING I have EVER posted here, but he knows it helps me!