I live with my partner. She has a mentally ill son with drug and alcohol addictions. He no longer lives with us because he was too much to deal with. Her and her family still deal with him even though he is an adult. Grandma and Grandpa still enable their grandson. It used to pisss me off but at the end of the day this isnt my s@#$. How they deal with him is their own doing. And he is the way he is because of them. ENTITLED. They have housed him in hotels even pay for his current apartment where he will be getting eveicted at the end of January cause he caused too much problems. They buy him alcohol and buy all his food. Give, give, give to the point its shutting them down while all he does is take take and take. All for what? Oh I remember...for keeping him "safe" which maked no sense to me cause he still does all the same dangerous things inside his "safe" home. They provide him his own space cause no one wants to live with him.

I've dealt with situation for over 5 years. Lots of crazy situations. My partner and I even broke up over him cause he was out of control in our home. Now we have our own living space without him, but of course she still deals with him. I mean I'm all supportive of her visiting him and spending time with him. Shes good with him like that now. She never used to be and it took her a long time to follow through her boundaries with him. Saying no to his request for drugs and alcohol. She started taking care of herself a little more too. But like this morning. She gets a call at 6am because once again he's being a disturbance. I have PTSD from all the years of this. Im angrier now and cold especially when it has anything to do with him. I dont care. I really dont care. And even I know thats not good.

My Partner calls me black and white and that I lack empathy and understanding to those who have mental health and addictions. Maybe I do and maybe I do because all the years I have seen them deal with him. I have always been the person on the outside so yes I'm not jaded by the truth. Her and her family tip toe around him like hes still a little boy. Not telling him hes getting eveicted cause it will hurt his feelings. Bailing him out of every little thing he has gotten himself into with no consequence or accountability. 5 years later, same never ending vicious cycle. Why? Cause nothing has changed with how they deal with him. I've learned to keep my mouth shut when my partner vents to me. Cause saying something back or giving the slightest oppinion pisses her off, even agreeing with her causes a riff. I get it, its a stressfull situation. Its her kid. And yes i feel horrible for what she is going through as a mother. I dont mean to make it worse. But her son has been walking over everyone who has took care of him. He Continues to manipulate everyone who has sacrficed everything for him. And he doesnt care, and yes i know why, its because he's sick. But What are the boundaries of using the word he is sick? I feel like there is none. Maybe I lack the empathy cause I grew up in a home not having ever dealt with anyone with addictions. I agree its hard for me to understand but it deosnt mean i havent tried to understand either. This is a lot...its always been a lot. And to be honest. Im sick of it.

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