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I am FURIOUS...and potentially not rightly so...

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Submitted by anchorlizard on Mon, 06/04/2012 - 5:01pm

so I figure this is the best place to come for feedback, in a safe way without causing waves.

So, a week ago today, SS (20) took his car (that is actually DH's, that DH lets him drive, and pays for insurance on-another story though. The other two cars we have were bought, and paid for, and carried on my insurance, by ME) down to stay with BM in another state. He gave no notice before he left, came up with some excuse about a job lead, and rolled. Every day since then, he has told DH "I will come back tomorrow."

Skid function, with BM attendance

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Submitted by anchorlizard on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 8:31am

So, summation of situation:

2 SDs (11, 15) live with BM
1 SS (20) lives with me and DH

In the immediate future, DH and I will be attending a school event for SD. We live in another state, so attendance at these events is fairly sporadic, and this is a big deal for us to go. Lately, BM has gotten a bit crazier and crazier with her demands and attempts to agitate DH (she flat out admitted her behavior is often to get a reaction from him, and make his life horrible.)

Oh Hail No

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Submitted by anchorlizard on Sun, 05/06/2012 - 11:31am

SO, I was just informed by DH that SS's girlfriend from another state will be coming to stay with us for a week. Starting tomorrow.

Things I flipped out about:
1) Lack of notification
2) DH not saying no
3) DH not discussing with me BEFORE granting permission
4) DH acting like I am behaving anything less than rationally when being PISSED about a houseguest I had no notification of coming to stay in my home for a WEEK while both SS and DH will be at work=I will be stuck at home with her.

Well that went well....NOT

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Submitted by anchorlizard on Thu, 05/03/2012 - 11:18am

So, after discussing with our family therapist, we put out a "roommate agreement" for all three of us (DH, me, and SS20) to sign. The rules were all pretty reasonable (in fact most of them were taken from a previous roommate contract I had with roommates before I moved in here. As I expected-FIREWORKS ensued. DH thought (and said so when I told the therapist I didn't think this would work) that SS really only wants harmony in the house and would of COURSE be enthusiastic and sign.

Then get your own place

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Submitted by anchorlizard on Tue, 04/24/2012 - 8:05pm

The spoiled, selfish SS20 keeps coming. Tonight he dropped $85 on the the new Madden play station game (on the heels of his fender bender in DH's car.) He had the night off from work, though of course instead of doing anything productive like applying to a college or looking for a career he basically screwed off.

It just gets worse

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Submitted by anchorlizard on Mon, 04/23/2012 - 8:37pm

So tonight SS20 comes home and announces that he rear=ended someone. But that as along as the damage is under $2000 he will cover.

All I can think right now is, damn right you will, and get the F out of my house. We continue to be nowhere as far as him getting gone. I hate to say this, but at some point we are going to reach my limit of BS and he is going to have to go live with his mom. COME ON MAN.

Some decisions were made

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Submitted by anchorlizard on Mon, 04/23/2012 - 9:25am

After continual prodding by me over the course of the week DH finally got SS out of bed before 1pm to talk about his obligations and plans. As I had previously thought, he has no savings and has been spending his money willy nilly as he desired. Nor does he have any long term goals or plans for getting out of our house. Like I thought, he has it too good here to try and go elsewhere.