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Planning a wedding, SD12 says she objects

rottierunner's picture

My bf and I have been together 5 years through his looooong and horrid divorce so I have known SD since she was 7!

Now I vent....
We are getting married in March 2013 and when he told his daughter, she cried "non stop for hours" and stated that she wasn't coming to the wedding.
I don't care....in fact, I would prefer that she stay home. Not my problem, but future dh....he's hurt!

SD said you shouldn't marry her Daddy because:

Every Christmas it's the same

rottierunner's picture

Totally my fault for staying with a man who refuses to set appropriate boundaries.

Every year, he gets up at the crack of dawn to go to his wife's house to watch his only child open up presents !
(Smack in the middle of a VERY expensive divorce)
This year, I learn that he has breakfast while there and opens his gifts and stocking ?!
I don't have children so maybe I don't understand what is usual in these kinds of situations.

Is this normal behavior for 10 y/o???????

rottierunner's picture

I don't have bio kids so I am not sure if my judgement is too harsh or ....

Last night FDH, SD10, and I were having dinner when the doorbell rang.
SD10 jumps out of seat, hides behind the kitchen cabinet and says "I am scared." When I go to answer the door, she's freaking out and asking her Daddy.."Who is it ?" (over and over)
It was a politician.

So my FDH doesn't notice or take issue with the behavior..
WTF ?
We live in a very safe neighborhood, and have a 100# rottweiler.

How to Pi$$ me off..

rottierunner's picture

Boundaries, we need them.

SD10's bathroom has sprouted a few new items while I was at work today.....
Apparently, BM and SD picked these things out about a month ago and then purchased for our house.

(This is NOT the first time, BM has chosen decorations for SD part of house.
The first time, I donated the stuff to Goodwill with DH approval.

This time, BM hands the stuff to FDH in front of SD making it "impossible" for him to refuse.

Really? BM suing for lifetime spousal support ?

rottierunner's picture

Ok, so FDH has been through mediation and years of court proceedings- not for custody/child support -but for spousal support. BM (SAHBM) wants LIFETIME spousal support because she has Fibromyalgia and Epstein-Barr. :sick:

This is the same woman who called me a money grubbing whore (not to my face, of course).

SD10 is such a B****

rottierunner's picture

Sorry folks, I would never use this adjective to describe a child but this kid.......

I am cleaning up after dinner and the little princess is still eating and says "Is there more mac and cheese ?"
DH and I kinda answer in unison "Yes, it's on the counter. "

Princess gets up and says .."You two are the laziest people !"

Excuse me ?
DH says to her "Now princess that's unacceptable "

I had to walk away because I was TEMPTED to tell her:

Step, so, I am not supposed to parent but do I have to tolerate ?

rottierunner's picture

I KNOW that I am not supposed to parent my 10.5 SD. The Skid therapist insisted that I have a clear understanding of the no parent rule.
Great!! I don't have any bio kids, so my parenting experience is nil!!

However, I would not let any child (related or not) speak to me in the way that SD does....

So during dinner last night she makes 3 uber snotty comments, by the the third:
I look at H and say "Hey, she needs to go to her room"

All the reading in the world, and I don't know what the H*** I am doing

rottierunner's picture

Ok, I don't have kids. But, now I have a SD, 9.
I really don't get it. I admit that I am intolerant.
I find her behavior towards her Dad: disrespectful.
Everything is an argument, and she never takes responsibility for her actions. Emotionally needy, always has to be the center of attention. (she must say Dada-1,000,000 times a day)(She also has takes over any conversation through (pick one)whining, crying, asking inane questions, etc..etc...
Sometimes, I would rather cut off my own hand than spend time with her.