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It's very very simple skids

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Submitted by 12yrstepmonster on Sat, 03/19/2011 - 1:15pm

it works like this, you come to my house- if you are part of the family you work along side of us. This will mean everything from cleaning a toilet to fixing farm fence. Do it right the first time, and you won't be asked to do it again. If you do the work, that means that when you are here you will enjoy the privilege of an occasional movie, going out to eat, an outfit/ shoes/ or sporting equipment of what you want, instead of what is bought by BM.

So you wonder why he doesn't want to come

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Submitted by 12yrstepmonster on Thu, 03/17/2011 - 8:21pm

YOu sit with your headphones one watching stupid videos or playing computer games.....DH you wonder why SS doesn't like to come here, or why he doesn't talk to you. It's pretty hard to talk to someone that has disengaged and is self serving.

GROW UP you are 45 years old and you don't have to play computer games like you were 18.

This is probably my biggest complaint. I HATE COMPUTER GAMES......I hate his computer....I am fed up with being the micro manager in our house.....UGH.

Gearing up for the summer fight

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Submitted by 12yrstepmonster on Mon, 03/14/2011 - 10:04pm

I guess after 12 years we would be used to having to "fight" for summer visits. It started with the CO saying that DH had 2 nonconsecutive two week visits, where BM had no visitation. You would have thought that enforcing that was ripping her limb by limb. For many reasons, but babysitting being the major, it was easier for us to exercise our visits around sd's activity that was at our house and for 4 weeks where BM had visitation.

I sit here tonight and wonder......how much of a fight it will be to get ss here for any length of time this summer.

Things to think about

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Submitted by 12yrstepmonster on Fri, 03/11/2011 - 4:24am

I always try to look at things from different perspectives. Many of us have sought out a place where we can be anonymous and gain support or input from people that we hope are indeed walking the same path or a similar one to the one we walk.

I've seen the same types of posting that I used to do on another board years ago. And feel sad for everyone that is going through it.

What is a NCP responsible for paying for

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Submitted by 12yrstepmonster on Wed, 03/09/2011 - 8:34pm

Determining what support should cover and what it shouldn't- what to help with and what not to help with.

So here's a list of things that we have been asked to pay for:

Class rings (the ring was picked out- designed and there was no compromise as to what was acceptable). Also we weren't told that the skid wanted this special ring and was told skid was to come up with half. We were told how much the ring was and wanted us to pay half.

a car was given to skid by bm, after bm divorced we were asked to pay for hundreds of dollars of car repairs.

And so it starts with SS

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Submitted by 12yrstepmonster on Sun, 03/06/2011 - 6:10pm

The same crap that SD did is now starting with SS. Calls up and says..gee dad can I do this on your weekend, that on your weekend. I don't want to come over this weekend. On the weeknight visit i need you to drop me off here at this time.

Dh's birthday weekend and SS isn't coming over he is going to a basketball game instead. He goes to the gym on the weeknight visit.

And I know that Dh can say no, but I'm sorry to the a certain degree I think that BM should say no......you dad gets you 4 days a month and it will not kill you to not go to the game.

feelings of guilt

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Submitted by 12yrstepmonster on Mon, 02/28/2011 - 9:58pm

How do you all deal with the guilt of blended families? step parenting? disengaging?

For 12 years I've felt guilty that we did more for the custodial kids in our house than the non custodial. I've felt guilty that we didn't have a bunch of extra money to be that disney land dad thing. I've felt guilty that they didn't like to come to our house (ok, BM said they didn't like to come, but either way it affected our relationship with skids). And I've felt guilty that I disengaged and rather enjoyed seeing SD fail miserably.

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