So this is long, and tedious, but I just dont know what to do. 

Last night I was hanging out with Munchkin SD12, she was happy and chatting. then she brought up the topic of "who comes first in the family". She is being taught in school that "the children should ALWAYS come first". I disagreed, and told her that the family unit's  #1 responsibility is the children, but that the spouses first consideration is the relationship with the spouse. I tried defining between WANTS and NEEDS, but she didnt hear me.