Hi there! This being my first entry since joining I am going to give a little background first. But it does lead up to an event that happened 2 days ago that I am still struggling to admit actually took place.

Following up on my previous entry, my wife reached out to my stepson today to see if he would want to come over, noting I have agreed to go to a friend's house for the day. He refused, saying he doesn't believe I won't show up to resolve things and will only meet her and my kids out somewhere. My wife told me she was very upset by this and continues to blame me for the situation. As a refresher, he put a boundary up of cutting me out of his life due to years of our negative relationship, me saying things, etc.

I've been married for 8 years, known my husband and SS for 11 years, we have 3 bio kids, and I don't think I can do this step mom thing anymore. The first 9 years were fine. Visitation during summers and every other major holiday. But since fall of 2020 we've (I've) had him full time. My husband is in the army and leaves a lot, he doesn't do much when he's here anyways (I swear he has a gaming addiction) and I'm a stay at home mom. My stepson from the beginning has been very sneaky, manipulative and lies frequently.

So, I had a meltdown weekend and I've ended up here... 

How do I tell my partner I don't want his disruptive son who has ADHD to come on my birthday day out as I want it to just be the two of us and I don't want anything to go wrong as when his son is with us he will create a scene but screaming at his dad that he wishes his dad was dead and that he is a rubbish dad which obviously embarrasses my partner greatly.

My bfs 6 yr old son is such a challenge for me. I want so much to like him. He is so utterly and pathetically coddled. It's not his fault!!! His mom did it to him and continues to do it at her house. I've worked patiently with him and his 10yr old sister, building a relationship with them. Overall it's going well. Esp with his sister, who at first wouldn't even look at me, and now gives me big hugs. 
 

Well, it happened. We knew it might. He was bound to have a child or two from his past wild behavior. Cut to last year, 6 kids in, and suddenly there's a new addition to the family. Surprise, it's a six foot tall 230 lbs uhh, 14 year old boy. We had talked about it several times. About how we would feel, how we would cope, how we would adjust... But life just happens, you know? I expected to be happy. And I was. I expected to be excited. And I was. What I did not expect was to feel an undeniably and deeply disturbing feeling of being an outsider in my own family.

I'm sure some of you are aware of my situation with my bf's son (pleasd refer to my previous blog if not). I was wondering what your advice would be on how to tell my BF that I won't be buying his son any presents for Christmas or communicating with him any longer.

Im 27 years old and got into a relationship with an older man at the age of 22. At the time he had a 10 year old son. His son has always been rude but every laughed it off as cheeky because he was cute and the youngest in his family.

I have always done my best to care for him despite this, bought food, clothing, looked after him, took him on days out, spoilt him even though he doesn't deserve it, cooked and cleaned for him. 

Where do I start... not much has changed on the weekend schedules for us. We maybe have an extra night together which doesn't make that much difference..... I'm really questioning whether or not this life is for me. Step parenting a child who has no respect for anyone is so hard. Why am I expected to love and treat this child as my own when really we haven't connected at all since our new baby was born. There's been a few instances of carelessness on SS behalf with the new baby which were quite dangerous and I would just not want to risk anything happening to my child.