So my weekend was irritating beyond belief. First of all if you have read any of my blogs you will know my frustrations with SO and ALWAYS having to do HIS family things over mine.... which leads me to my first irritation. My son who is 13 lost a friend last week in a horrible automobile accident. The accident claimed 5 lives. We live in a VERY small community. Everybody knows everybody here. Last week was awful. And to make matters worse 8th grade recognition was on Friday (two days after our students lost their classmate) we had planned to take my son because all the kids were going to show support and support each other and my son has many friends in that class. We also know many of the parents etc. SO was on the fence about going with me (which pissed me off from the get go) then with two hours notice his family calls to tell him that last minute they got two extra tickets to his nephews graduation which is in two hours. I completely understand that trumps what we had planned. BUT this happens ALL the time. WE make plans and his family calls last minute and we are expected to drop everything. I was so PIST OFF. So of course SO gets all dressed and leaves to go there. I took my son and four of his friends to the graduation. I am however happy to say I don't let this ruin my plans anymore. I decided a while ago that my son, my family are equally important and if SO chooses to not engage in it then so be it. So then saturday rolls around and it's the funeral of the family that our community lost. I get up get my son up and we are getting ready. SO doesn't even get out of bed which tells me he isn't going with us. He isn't coming to support me or my son at a time when really honestly we needed him. So we leave for a two hour funeral which was very hard.

My next irritation:
9pm rolls around and BM #1 calls. I'm leaving here in 15 minutes I will bring the boys to you around 3am BUT I need them back at my mothers first thing in the morning (her mother's being 40 minute drive for us) Um what? Okay I'm not saying skids couldn't come because I for one have been missing those boys alot. So then SO texts her back and says well we have church over that direction at 11 and then we are headed to nephews graduation BBQ could we just take the boys? She texts back NO. I need them at my mom's they need to spend as much time there as possible we are heading back home at 3pm (home being 6 hours away) What ever....... so the boys come at 3am and we have them till 10:30am. I'm still thinking wtf is this? But what can I do....... then sunday.........

So my family was down and I had not seen my niece for 4 years. So I told SO look my uncle and my nieces are here how about we skip church to spend time with them till your nephew's party starts at 1? My SO says yeah we just can't skip church.... so I said fine I will drop you off at your family's and I will go see mine then you can text me when you are done at yours and I'll come get you. I was so pist! Why can't we see both? Is there not enough hours in a day to visit BOTH families? SERIOUSLY? This is where his family comes in as being so demanding of "time" His sister in law texts me at 10am and says, "your not waiting till one to come over are you?" I text her back well I asked you on friday what time the BBQ was you told me 1 and SO asked as well and you told him 1. So we are going to church then running and errand and he will be there at 1. She texts me back and says HELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!! You are family NOT guests. I was like huh? I was so confused. I showed SO. And you will never believe what his response was... OMG well we skipped church of course because his family was being demanding. So let me see if I get this right we CAN'T skip church to see my family which I haven't seen in 5 years but we can skip to see family we have to see every damn weekend??????

I was so angry. Then I texted her and told her I prob wouldn't be there since my family was here. Then she texted a simple "ok" followed with a little bit of attitude I could tell that pissed her off. So we stopped at SO mothers house and asked her what time they were going over there she asked why? WE told her about what his SIL said. She said well she probably feels that YOU (meaning me) havent been to any of our functions lately so she probably feels you aren't wanting to. OMG are you FREAKEN kidding me? I didn't go to the nephews graduation because MY son comes first. What part of that does his family NOT get? So then I was just pist. I said well my family is here and I haven't seen them in years and I need to go spend time with them. I asked SO if we could go to my family first then his. And nope. He was fine with me dropping him off at his then me leaving to go to mine. Just anger inside of me. So I told my family (since they were painting my grandma's house) that I would see them around 4pm and they were good with that. When we got to SIL house she opened the door WHY would you think I was mad... oh lovely MIL called her to tell her what we said. Nice... so my SO told her that we took her texts as she was angry we weren't there till one. SO told her you told both of us 1pm. Not come early because you are family.... So with that we went in and my son was still having a rough time with the weekend so he sat in the kids living room most of the time and I sat with him trying to keep him company. SIL kept coming in telling me we DIDN'T have to be there and we could leave anytime to go see MY family. Seriously she came in 4 times to say that. I finally told her we are going at 4pm all of us.

THEN SO phone rings. Its SD17 calling. Come get me from grma's I want to come over....... um ok. What about the boys.. oh they are with so and so out shooting guns etc. OK so what happened to the NO you can't have the boys today because we are spending as much time as possible with grandparents? What ever is my thoughts....... SD17 has not been back since the awful January incident so this was just the topper of my weekend. He went to get her. Brought her back. Not one word did she speak to my son nor I. And I didn't offer a single word either. I am so DONE with it. Then BIL says to her (he knows her games) so your brothers weren't allowed to come over eh? She replies, "nobody told us about the party or they could have!" Much attitude in her words. I about blew..... UM yes we did. WE texted her freaken mother the night before telling her our plans for sunday and if they could come. Her reply was NO. Which SO kindly told SD17 that.
After about two hours of watching her prance around yelling for her daddy for everything she announced she had to go. We were all at the table outside and nobody aknowledged her standing there so she repeated herself. MIL said oh ok well by. And that was the only person who said goodbye to her. AS everyone knows her drama and her games and her BS. I for one didn't even look up. Not when she walked in and not when she walked out. I am hoping that (and this sounds mean I know) she will not come for summer is she see's I'm not kissing her ass anymore.

I was just furious with the entire day. All of the weekend to be honest. We finally left at 4pm and headed to my family's house. SO just doesn't get that its ok to split the day. I know he was reluctant and did it because he knew if he didn't I would be pist off. When is his family going to understand that I have family too. MY family is equally important. I am so sick of their last minute calls and texts and then getting pissy at SO because we have already made plans and them expecting him to drop everything because they have called. It's getting to be assnine.

I can't even believe I'm going to say this but here it goes.....

When SO and I got together he had mentioned that BM #1 struggled with his family. I thought she was crazy in that aspect. Hell his family is great.. but now that I have been in this for almost 2 years I am seeing what she probably was feeling.

Ok I'm done. Sorry for the long blog