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I want to just disappear

Bubbly1's picture

Submitted by Bubbly1 on Sat, 01/21/2012 - 10:31am

:sick: As I sit here, disgusted with myself, my life, my fdh. I can't help but wonder "what might have been"
Jabba has won again. I will never understand how my brilliant, college educated fdh does not see this. She has made threats, screamed accusations, and just badgered us until.....she gets exactly what she wants. And dfdh doesn't see it this way. Oh, No. She is truly sorry THIS time. (Just like she has been for the past 50 times) until, something sets her off again! And we're back to square one all over again. I do NOT accept her apology, I will not ever. She has made our lives HELL for almost three years! No longer will I try to be her friend, it does not work. No longer will I try to be civil, it does not work. All pick ups, drop offs, will be business transactions.

I hate this woman, I hate her with a passion reserved for only my most hated enemy. That is exactly what she has become.

Comments

dreamingofhappiness's picture

Submitted by dreamingofhappiness on Sat, 01/21/2012 - 10:41am

I could not agree more... I feel the same about the EX BITCH that I have to deal with as well... Read my last blog and you will understand...

My steps asked me to enter their house one day, I simply shook my head NO... I got the puzzled look from hell, but was never asked why...

I stand OUTSIDE. Grab what is needed and Walk away, I do not even LOOK at the witches direction.... So, don't feel bad, You are not the only one... LOL...

Lord help me..'s picture

Submitted by Lord help me.. on Sat, 01/21/2012 - 12:59pm

Sometimes I think that DH is oblivious, or acts the part anyway because he's like a beaten dog with his tail in between his legs. I look at it as she (BM) is his emotional abuser. It was worse in the beginning. Every demand she had, he met, and he believed everything she said..including the time when she told him she had cancer and was dying! (Oh, i wish she would)..lol. Not really. But its sick what this woman does. We all know how hard it is. But unfortunately, we all made our beds.. We decided to get involved knowing the baggage was there. Never really expecting that it would be this bad. It will be a daily struggle, but make sure to communicate with your DH. Even if you feel like you aren't being heard. Write him letters, show him articles on statistics of blended families.. I have found that it helps with us. Because it is not me that is attacking the relationship..He reads about it. About how hard it is for us step-moms and what we have to deal with on all sides of the coin! I recommend reading the book "Step-Monster". It is awesome! Also, a book called "How we love" by Milan Yerkovich. It is a Christian based book but it has really helped my DH and I during the "rough patches".

Bubbly1's picture

Submitted by Bubbly1 on Sun, 01/22/2012 - 10:12am

Thanks All, its been one thing after another with her. It seems never ending. He will speak so calmly to her but turn around and raise his voice to get his point across to me. She has his kids, I don't. He has to kiss her butt, or never see his girls. It makes me resent them all, fdh, skids, bm.

I cannot tell him how I feel, because then somehow, its turned into "you hate my kids". I HATE this situation, not the sd's. I want this situation to go away, not the sd's (though, if they did it would). I need a really good therapist at this point, some xanax wouldn't hurt either. Washed down with a couple bottles of wine.