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Family pictures....

daybyday's picture

Submitted by daybyday on Sun, 04/24/2011 - 11:40am

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What does your ideal family picture look like? Does it include your stepkids?

I have such a battle between my heart and mind on this. In my heart, my family is my DH, BD, and BS. SS14 isn't included. In my mind, I know that he should be. He has just caused so much trauma and disruption in our lives that I view him as the enemy in many ways.

He's lived with us the last 7 years. It has been hell. He has finally realized he has used up every second chance and every do-over. Finally, he is going back to live with him BM. She's awful and it is a bad decision, but we tried to stop him and things here just got worse.

I'm so exctied that I may finally be able to get what I consider to be a 'real' family picture since he won't be living here. He'll be over a thousand miles away......it's like a dream come true.

GoodbyeNormaJean's picture

Submitted by GoodbyeNormaJean on Sun, 04/24/2011 - 1:35pm

I don't do family pictures. I have the childrens pictures made individually. My parents don't want pics all the pictures they're given to have my skids. I completely understand that.

Right now since SD cut her own hair and BMs idea of fixing it was a mullet, she isn't in ANY pictures. She was going to model for a photo shoot with my beautiful daughter, but now forget it.

godess-clueless's picture

Submitted by godess-clueless on Sun, 04/24/2011 - 2:42pm

I tell my children that when they give me pictures I do not want anything but the bio kids in them. Rude of me--probably , but 20 yrs. ago I got tired of having pictures I could not hang or display because they included spouses, girlfriends, or boyfriends that were serious at the moment and long forgotten a yr. later. I just had enough of being expected to include all the various children that were not related and seldom if ever seen by me. As the years roll on the amount of pictures that contain kids I never knew just increased. If the child was living in the home then it is a little different. Just because the step is important to their parent does not mean the kid is important to you.

smof5's picture

Submitted by smof5 on Sun, 04/24/2011 - 2:50pm

My family accepts my skids as family, so we all get our pictures done together, all 9 of us. The only thing I have a question about is wanting MY kids and MY pictures taken (mommy and kids) but I am afraid my DH will think I'm not being very acceptable of his kids.?

stepsonhatesme's picture

Submitted by stepsonhatesme on Sun, 04/24/2011 - 2:57pm

We STILL havent had any family photos taken and its been 5 yrs. I've already told DH that when(and if) we have them taken we are having alot of different sets....1 with just my bio kids....1 with just SS....1 with ALL 5 kids....1 with him and his boys.....1 with me and my kids.....1 with just me and DH....AND 1 with the whole family together.
That way I can give my family pics of just kids and of whole famly and same for his side.....hell we might even give BM pics of just the 2 SS. and her side of family too (we still get along with them)

Still Have Hope's picture

Submitted by Still Have Hope on Sun, 04/24/2011 - 5:21pm

I insisted that we do at least one pose without the skids so that my parents get a family photo of DH, I and their grandkids. Of course, I got a copy for myself also. We got one including the skids for DH's side of the family.

what-was-I-thinking's picture

Submitted by what-was-I-thinking on Sun, 04/24/2011 - 6:34pm

I refuse to do a 'family' picture!! I think mostly its because I dont want anyone to mistake me to be the skidmark's mother!!! I'm pretty sure my parents really wouldnt mind the skid in the pic, DH & I have been married for 7 years now. Its not like I send my parents the skids pic or anything.

NewBeginning's picture

Submitted by NewBeginning on Sun, 04/24/2011 - 6:47pm

I absolutely refuse to be in any pics with my SD20. For any reason. Anyone that has put my marriage down so much and feels I'm her father's worst mistake...NADA.

I'm afraid the only kind of picture I'd like hanging in my home would be one of me strangling her.

I'd hang it proud. Smile

anabihibik's picture

Submitted by anabihibik on Mon, 04/25/2011 - 12:21am

Mine includes FSS8. But, he isn't the problem in our situation, really. He's a good kid, who does normal kid things, but I know he cares about me and thinks of me as part of his family. I think of him as part of mine.

Roseybird's picture

Submitted by Roseybird on Mon, 04/25/2011 - 9:20am

IMO, my SD15 (although as f'ed up as she has been and will probably be) is included in all family pictures. We normally do them once a year around Thanksgiving. We have them to send for Christmas. Now, she isn't in any other pictures other than the Thanksgiving/Christmas pictures. However, my boys are taking pictures throughout the year (Easter, birthday, 3 months, 6 months, 9 months...). The Easter pictures are taking because I have family thousands of miles away and they want to see my 2 boys only - not my SD15. Just a fyi, my family has met my SD15 on numerous occasions and they don't care for her either. So, they prefer just pictures of the boys. Also, most of the time the boys are set up for pictures, SD15 is never here. I make sure I schedule them when she isn't around. However, if SD15 tells us she wants to take pictures, we would let her. But she always wants to spend the money on something else. Figures.