Only one step in the house this morning. Left the baskets out for the two skids and my bio. Bio is 9, so even though skids are 15 and 16, I still leave baskets for all. Not real exciting- the skids got $5 each, 2 cans of soda, pencils, some chocolate and socks. Yes, I said socks. That's what they needed!

I heard skid 16 shout out "Socks! Man, I needed some! Thanks, Easter bunny!"

Later, he tapped on the door and thanked me.

All mine said thank you. However we don't do the normal Easter baskets, we get them something they can use in their rooms like an organizing item and put various things in there for them, like candy and body spray, bath stuff. They are all teens and they need things like that.

Mine all said thanks. DH is taking the skids home now. Went upstairs and saw their overflowing wastebasket. They ate all their candy in one day?! And we had a huge dinner with cheesecake for dessert. My bios have eaten about 4 pieces of candy each. No wonder we have such huge dental bills from BM.

SS18 got a packet of peeps. Actually I threw them at him as he went down the stairs. I called out Happy Easter! He said Thanks, can you put them in the freezer for me? and tossed them back. He will eat them later when he gets back from his mothers place. It was perfectly OK and we roll like that.

GD4 got an easter basket with soaps, a bath doll and a strawberry shortcake tiny doll. She thought the $5 bath doll was awesome!

$100 on Easter baskets? Oh wow!

We had to do Easter baskets with the steps last Saturday. My son was at his dad's so we did his today. Everyone here seemed happy and thankful for what they got.

i didnt get ss13 a basket cuz i havent seen him in 5 months=but anywho I did my dd13, ds11, and dd9. I just wanted to comment on how wonderful it was to buy things I wanted to get them rather than worrying over "fairness" as I would have if ss was here. Typicaly if ss were here I'd get just candy, easter related items-but this year I did whatever I wanted and got them what i wanted and felt like they needed-which was all different costs but amazingly none of my bios complained. I spent well over 100.00 on my dd13 because I bought her some spring clothes which she needed ( I had bought the other two clothes some weeks ago that I found at a sale-didnt get dd13 any then as it is harder to find her clothes on sale)-My ds11 got candy, sunglasses, and 25.00 itunes card. My dd9 got two littlest pet shop toys, a pack of training bras (she laughed at that one-the "easter bunny" got her bras!, sunglasses, candy. My ds's basket probably cost me about 40.00 tops-dd9's was probably 50.00 and then as I said dd13's was over 100.00. No one complained at all. If ss would have been there I couldnt have done individual items like that-it all would have been the same. I couldnt do clothes as my dh would want to buy ss the same amount of cltohes-which I have a problem with since bm already gets money to buy ss's clothes with.

Just so refreshing not to have to worry about step dynamics for the holidays!

I'm so tired of the "treat your bio kids this way, but treat the step kids that way." It's all a bunch of bull... if they WERE our kids, things would be done completely different. If OUR kids acted a certain way, they would get disciplined as such. Perhaps this should be said... "listen bucko... when my kids act out, this is what I do. So if you want me to reward, love, and treat YOUR kids as I do my bio kids, that also means treating them as mine when they act out." What an effin cop out and I hate it.

On another note, SPOILED. Take their stuff and put it in your room. When they ask if you know where it is, simply respond, "oh I have them. I didn't hear you say thank you so I figured you didn't want them. And since I spent a lot of money on these things, I would rather return them and get my money back, rather them sit in your room being wasted."

Why haven't you brought this up to your SO? He should be embarrassed at their manners.

misfitmomma I hear ya b/c when I fist married my dh all i ever heard was "treat them like your own" However no one ever really meant it b/c if they did I would have tore my ss15's butt up all day every day! He is out of his bullying stage but man when I first came in the pic he was HORRIBLE! However I was expect to never correct him and wait for dh to do it but dh didn't do much for fear bm would come unglued.

I did after telling dh for years that I was going to blow if he didn't do something. I finally blow when he punched his little brother b/c he thought he was going to hit him and I was home with them alone. I hit him back!!! Amazingly he hasn't hit since! And even more amazingly bm backed me up. That was weird but it worked.

Little off topic but I wanted to just say I know where you are coming from when that really isn't want they mean when they say that crap!

0

One skid at home (16). Said thank you and gave me a hug. The other away in school.(Sent a card) The getting better is all realative. I don't know if we just cope better or they get better? Be patient, try not to take it personally. You just show up and do you. I think in the long run they know how fortunate they are to have someone else care about them. I have quietly taken or removed a gift if there was no thank you. I explained to the SD that if you appreciate someone's effort you say thank you. I had to do this on three separate occasions with the oldest. She quickly learned to show say thank you or the opportunity was taken away; It's tough because they spend a lot of energy trying to bury their feelings. They think that they are not suppose to like or appreciate anything even though they do. I just give the item and tell them thanks for sharing their time with me and the family. I often tell them that I am lucky to have them as a my skids. They are still a little distant but they have grown emotionally and have learned it won't hurt to be appreciative. You get better even if they don't. Keep your head up and laugh a lot.

Sometimes, I wish there wasn't a character for holidays. I'm learning to not make anything "cool" from the character. For instance, for Christmas, Santa left some Star Wars Lego guys in FSS8's stocking and he got a book and a DVD from me under the tree. Next year, it would be more like Santa left a book and DVD in the stocking and the lego guys would be from me. I knew he was getting about 4 baskets between all the grandparent and parent houses, so his Easter basket from the bunny at our house left bubbles and sidewalk chalk. Little did I realize FMIL was bringing over two baskets for him. I currently have a total of 8 chocolate bunnies in a house where 3 people live. The Toothless Fairy is going to make an appearance to take some of the chocolate bunnies to kids who didn't get any. Since he believes in the characters, I didn't get a thank you. But, he was super excited about the bubbles, so we went outside to play with our bubbles together. That was enough for me.

Luckily for me, SD15 hasn't come back to our house. That means, no Easter dress, shoes, outfit after church, etc. So, I'm great! My boys (3 and 9 months) enjoyed their Easter egg hunts and was just excited to go out and have fun. Is glad that SD15 wasn't here because we would have had nothing but complaints the WHOLE weekend.

However, I did see a picture on FB that she wore the same dress we bought her last year for Easter - but where, IDK, because her BM doesn't go to church. Oh well.

Anyway, DH uses goes all out for SD15 on Easter as well. We could spend more than $200 on her just for Easter (hair included). So, I am grateful that we didn't have that expense this year. However, SD15 learned early in her age to say thank you for things we get for her. However, as she grows older, she's just starting to be 'ok' with the things we buy. Such as life....