My husband and I don't have much of a relationship with my 18 yr old SD who moved out 6 months ago after a big fight with her dad over lying, stealing, being promiscuous etc etc etc. She moved in with BM and has since continued to run around, get tattoos, piercings and basically acts like trailer trash. She calls once in a while to speak to her little brother who is 9 and he misses her very much. She has stopped by the house a few times to see him (and show off her new piercings and rub it in our faces that she is 18 and can do whatever she wants).
She came by a couple of weeks ago for exactly a min and I let our son run out to say hello(I personally have stopped speaking to her). I just found out the other day that she gave him a cell phone and told him not to tell us. Well, our son broke down the other day sobbing from the pressure of the "secret" cell phone and gave it to me. It appears that his sister and her new flavor of the month boyfriend have been texting and calling him. Our son also told me that he has received pornographic pictures via the secret cell phone as well. He deleted them so I didn't have a chance to see where they were coming from. My guess is that the phone is an old pay as you go one that SD had and it's her friends sending these images. I am BEYOND angry and our son was very very upset about keeping this secret phone for two weeks and not telling us. Both my husband and I had a talk with him about keeping secrets and made it clear that he is never to keep secrets from us because his sister told him to. It was very unfair for my SD to put him in the position of "don't tell mom and dad" to begin with and going behind our backs and giving him a cell phone. I am very tempted to cut off their relationship completely.
My husband took the cell phone and turned it off and we have not heard from her but I think that my husband should call and confront her about this instead of waiting until she calls the house again. I also think that the phone should be thrown out. I made it very clear to my husband that she is not to get that phone back. He is upset by the situation but i don't feel that he is nearly as mad as I am.