HappyB4's blog
Hi.
About 5 years ago, I married a sweet, intelligent man with two adult daughters and a teenage son. The two daughters were out of the house (though one left a truckload of junk behind her), and the son went back & forth between his father & his mother. His son was chronologically a junior in high school but had less than a year's credit. In his chaotic room, he had a computer and his own phone. He would stay up as late, and sleep through the hours when he belonged in school. His father would come home from work & his teenager would be sitting in front of the TV, surrounded by his clutter, & his father would make up a plate for him and serve him in front of the TV.
After an ongoing battle with the son refusing or just ignoring requests & instructions to do homework,clean up, get to school, or be polite, plus some extra garbage that his mother set him up to pull off, his father get fed up. He told the kid he was taking him to his mother's house & not bringing him back til he straightened up his act. He didn't come back.
That was when we got married.
Generally, we've been pretty happy. Then about 3 months ago, the then-teenage spoiled brat, now 22 ("dss22") moved in with us after falling out of a couple of colleges (not attending classes) & a couple of part-time jobs. And you know what? Both DH & dss22 are acting pretty much like they did before DH & I got married...
That's how I got to steptalk.
I'm not sure what I'm supposed to put on the blog; I'll probably figure it out in time.
This is what's going on now & how
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Comments
Welcome! This site helps keep
Welcome! This site helps keep the stress level down for me. I would tell your SS adult a-- to do whatever you need done around the house, generally make it as uncomfortable as you can, meaning he will have many responsibilities and you should feel free to nag him to do any and all of them }:) He is an adult and he should be made to act like one! IMHO
I see my SS18 going down this
I see my SS18 going down this same path. What is up with these kids thinking evryone owes them something.
SS18 just started college, his mother(CP) was threatened with court due to his truancy his senior year of high school, DH bribed him to attend class. Now he has to do it on his own (though I'm sure BM, sister and girlfriend will have to give him a wake up call and make sure he's up)Ugggg! I have my doubts as to whether he will stick it out for the first year.
He has already asked DH to get him a job and he can move in with us. WHF?!? I told my DH If he moves in with us we will probably end up in (divorce)court. I also let him know that it would not be good for his relationship with his son, my relationship with his son, and especially our relationship.
We had him EOW and DH completely catered to him the whole time. SS did pretty much what he wanted at BMs with no responsibilities. He basically used intimidation to get his way. No way is that going to happen in my house.
Your SS has to move out!